Running
by rockbandstar
Summary: When Edward refuses to change Bella she is worried about him growing tired of her and she marries Jacob. When Bella's world begins to fall apart, and her marriage is on the brink of the end, Bella turns to the Cullen's for help, protection, and more. BXE
1. The begining of the end

**Running**

When Edward refuses to change Bella she is worried about him growing tired of her (and her ever impending death) and she marries Jacob. When Bella's world begins to fall apart, and her marriage is on the brink of the end, Bella turns to the Cullen's for help, protection, and something more. A BXE story.

_And did you get what  
you wanted from this life, even so?  
I did.  
And what did you want?  
To call myself beloved, to feel myself  
beloved on the earth._

_-Raymond Carver (an excerpt from the poem "Late Fragment")_

**The beginning of the end**

The beginning of the end of her marriage started with a book, or rather started with the throwing of a book. Bella still wasn't quite sure how she had gotten to this point, but she had a good idea. It had all started with a kiss, innocent enough right? But that was the start of her running, both literally and physically. It was not lost on anyone how ironic it was that the girl who was so clumsy had taken up running. It was also not lost on anyone as to exactly what she was running from. Her choices had been made, although baffling to some, and as some might have said it was her bed to lie in.

Bella had been a horrible liar for most of her life, and it was also not lost on her friends that at some point that had changed. They were surprised when she had made an announcement stating her engagement to Jacob Black. That surprise likely stemming from her hatred of marriage, and the fact that she was still dealing with the loss of her soul mate.

Edward Cullen

They were even more surprised when she actually went through with the engagement, and married him. Although, distraught would have been a more appropriate term. After all everyone knew who she really belonged with, even Bella herself. Little could persuade her even the energetic pixie fortuneteller that was Alice. So they sat back watched, and waited.

Her wedding was beautiful, albeit small, and did little to assuage her friends concerns. Especially when the groom got drunk with his tribe friends and proceeded to dance around the floor to "Baby got Back." Her maid of honor Alice, of course, pulled her to the side and pointed out what she claimed "was Bella's mistake."

"Tell me one thing and I will never question your decision making ever again." Alice asked as she sweetly batted her eyes.

Bella quickly agreed, sensing that if she didn't answer it would only encourage the wrath of her friends even more.

"Why are you marrying him when you are oh so clearly meant to be with my idiot of a brother?" Alice questioned glaring in the corner. At that moment her eyes followed the direction of Alice's head and her breath caught in her throat. He was there, at her wedding, and he definitely did not look happy.

It took Bella a moment to answer, not because she wasn't expecting the question, but more because she really didn't have a direct response. That and she was distracted by Alice's 'idiot brother.'

"Alice," she stated softly "I know you don't understand and I am not sure I can really explain it to you. He refuses to change me," Bella stated and frowned as she continued "and I get older every day. I can't deal with the thought of losing him let alone if he left me again. It's just the only way."

Alice looked at her best friend for a moment and Bella realized that if Alice could cry she would be. "I still love you guys and you are still my family." Bella continued "I need you to accept my husband, Alice, I don't know if I can live with you guys hating him forever."

A small smile played on Bella's lips as she joked about the Cullen's immortality and it didn't go unnoticed by Alice. The small pixie like girl simply nodded her head softly and promised that they would "try."

While the Cullen's made every effort to "get along with the dog" Bella couldn't help but notice that Edward was always absent from their get-togethers. When she questioned Emmett one night he simply rolled his eyes at the poor girl and replied that it was "too hard."

That had been three years ago, and in that time she had learned more than she ever knew she would on becoming a good wife. She had also learned that some friendships were more difficult than they should be. After all her husband Jacob, the werewolf had a rather hard time getting along with her best friends the vampires. It didn't help his feelings any that at one point in her life she had wanted to be one of them. Her life had changed drastically since then.

She had seen Edward again after the wedding but they always chose to keep somewhat of a distance between them. After all it wasn't just hard for Edward to stay away, and Bella began to realize that. She remembered Alice once telling her just after she announced her engagement how excruciating it would be for them all. She only now was starting to realize how true that statement was. But Bella kept busy, her time had been occupied with not only being a wife but also a mother, albeit briefly.

"Why do you run so much?" Jacob asked looking at her through small slits in his eyes as she rolled out of bed and began her daily routine.

"Because I like the endorphins," Bella responded rolling her eyes as she answered his question.

"No," he replied "I think it is something else entirely."

It suddenly occurred to her-in such a brilliant revelation of honesty- what the fuck she had gotten herself into. During the three years of marriage he had know her every thought, feeling, and plan. The revelation scared her. Not only because he knew her deeper than she had imagined but also because of what exactly that implied.

Edward Cullen

Always in the back of her mind, the thought of what he was saying suddenly sent her mind reeling. She suddenly felt furious for the years of her life she had wasted, that she had mourned.

"I gave you what he couldn't" Jacob sneered softly looking at her fully now "I know you Bella, remember."

She thought back to her daughter Amber and was instantly filled with a deep seeded grief. She had produced a defective baby at least that is what it had felt like. No one could explain the instant and sudden death of her child, but that did little to console the fact that she had found _her baby_ lying gray in a crib.

She couldn't help the flinch that crippled its way across her features and onto her face, or the hole in her heart that tore just a bit more.

"You're not running for the endorphins," Jacob commented seeming not noticing her reaction or choosing to ignore it. "It's a classic psychological response, called avoidance. I think you are running away from the pain you feel."

That was the point her marriage ended, at least that is what she told herself. She grabbed the nearest object, which just so happened to be a copy of pride and prejudice, and chucked it with all of her might at his head. Her only thought was that she had wished it was a hard cover instead of a soft. Maybe then it would hurt more.

He glared at her then, anger fully present on his features, before reaching over and grabbing her. He held tightly to her hand as his body shook in anger and she momentarily wondered if he was going to phase. Jerking her arm away from him she quietly nodded her head before replying "I see." And then she ran.


	2. Forks Inn

**Forks Inn**

**A/N- at the end!**

It didn't really occur to her at the time to grab anything from the house that they had shared; she would just have to make do without. It also didn't occur to her until much later that the minute she was down the block she would once again be "viewable" to Alice and exactly what it would look like. She felt the tears streaming down her face as her feet hit the pavement but all her body felt was numb.

She was thankful, at least, that she had her wallet in her pocket which included a couple of credit cards. She would definitely need those if she was going to start over. She ran without thought and quickly made her way to the only hotel in forks and rented a room. The clerk looked at her funnily and she realized she was covered in sweat and probably looked horrendous. She didn't care.

"It looks like you don't need help with your bags," the clerk stated smiling softly although it came across mockingly to Bella.

"I left quite quickly," Bella mumbled suddenly feeling embarrassed that she would be the new town gossip. 'Poor little Bella Swan who left her husband after dealing with the death of her child.' It was so tragic, she knew. Rolling her eyes she quickly grabbed the key out of the clerks hand and made her way down the hall. She didn't miss the snide "I see," that escaped his mouth as she left the lobby. Yep, she was definitely going to be the town's new gossip. But for some reason, this fact didn't bother her.

She showered quickly washing the grime of the run off of her skin, but couldn't help but hope she was washing away her past as well. After showering she lay on the bed in her towel and looked at the room around her. It definitely was a Forks motel that was for sure. The walls were a faded blue wallpaper and the only decoration was a yellow plush chair in the corner. The chair had definitely seen better days.

She lay for a moment staring at the patterns in the ceiling before reaching over and picking up the phone on the nightstand. She knew she needed to call her father, but she also knew that he would be disappointed in her and her choice to 'run from her problems.' Nevertheless it needed to be done.

Charlie answered the phone on the first ring and she wondered if he was sitting by the phone waiting for her call. It wouldn't surprise her in the least if Jacob had called and spilled his guts to Charlie. It wouldn't have been the first time.

"Bells how are you?"

The question should have been a hard one to answer but she had no hesitation in the matter. "I'm fine, look Char-Dad I need to tell you something and I am not sure how you are going to take it so I am just going to say it. I left Jacob."

"Permanently or you just need some space?" Charlie asked and she could hear the disappointment ballooning in his tone.

"Permanently" Bella answered letting out a huge sigh as she did so. She couldn't help but notice that her father didn't sound surprised. What he said next sure took the air out of her lungs, though.

"Does this have anything to do with Edward Cullen?" Charlie asked.

"No dad it has to do with the fact that Jacob has been an insensitive prick since we lost Amber."

"You kids are young," he responded "you can try again."

"There isn't going to be an again, dad. I'm done." It was at that moment that she noticed the large bruise that had formed on her wrist and a small "oh" escaped her mouth. She gently reached over and touched the skin, wincing when she noticed how tender it felt.

"I really think you need to sleep on this Bells," he responded "I don't want you to end up like your mother and I."

"I think we're pretty much past that point, Dad. I understand you love Jacob but I am your daughter and I need you to be there for me."

A deep sigh was heard on the other end of the phone before Charlie continued speaking. "Where are you at Bells? Do you need me to come get you?"

"I'm at the Forks Inn, Dad, and I just need some time. Please don't tell Jacob where I am. I will talk to him when I am ready."

"Ok, Bells, I understand." He replied "If you need anything you know you can call."

"I know" she answered "and thanks for listening."

She placed the phone back on the receiver and fell back into the bed. 'Who knew a phone call could be so exhausting' she thought as she once again stared at the ceiling. The bumps in the ceiling started to meld together and she closed her eyes and fell into a deep slumber.

"Be quiet or you are going to wake her!" the voice whispered loudly before letting out a low growl. "Never mind you already did!"

Bella woke to the sound of someone whispering in her room and her thoughts were instantly frantic. She lay still for a moment before slowly opening her eyes and meeting a pair of black ones standing over her.

"Good morning, sleepyhead." Alice stated and it was then that Bella noticed a bag being held over her face.

"What's that?" she asked.

"Clothes, silly, unless of course you want to continue wearing a towel, I don't mind."

She heard some rusting at the end of the bed and she sat up quickly and her eyes met two pairs of ocher eyes.

"Hello, dear" Esme stated softly smiling "It's wonderful to see you, I just wish it was under better circumstances."

The second set of eyes sat and stared at her, but continued to be silent. She chose to ignore them.

"What are you guys doing here?" Bella asked somewhat confused.

"Well," Alice stated sheepishly "I saw you running and crying. You looked horrible by the way but a shower did you wonders. Anyways I just needed to make sure that you were ok. That and I knew that you would need some clothes!" She smiled then and shook the bag once more.

"You just needed an excuse to shop," Bella mumbled under her breath causing the other two to laugh and Alice to frown.

"I don't have to give them to you, if you prefer you could wander around town in a towel." That changed Bella's mind rather quickly. "I think I prefer the clothes," she stated and reached for the bags. The next thing she heard were three loud gasps. It was then that she remembered the nice hand shaped mark around her wrist.

**A/N- Wow I just wanted to thank everyone for their reception on the first chapter! I want to dedicate this chapter to those of you who **_**reviewed**_** (yourblackmuse, Ashlyn13, lpo, and Veronicaloves05), added to your **_**favorites**_** (yourblackmuse and mahley25), or **_**alerts**_** (A Romance Novel, Thokul, Ashlyn13, Peny11 and Veronicaloves05). Special thanks to my beta for this story Ashlyn13 (Thanks for the inspiration!). I also wanted to answer a few questions I had gotten:**

**This is an Edward and Bella story! I know it seems strange that Bella is married to Jacob but she acted rashly and out of fear, she is a lot older and more mature and she has definitely learned from her mistakes!**

**Jacob is a werewolf so of course one can only assume that there may be some difficulties with anger, especially since he and Bella lost their child most suddenly. Some of you think this seems very out of character but think about it: He is married to what he considers the love of his life but he secretly knows she is pining for another…. Add to that the fact that they had had a child together, but that child died and it truly is what some would say "the catalyst" or "acid" to the relationship.**

**I love your reviews they are like warm chocolate chip cookies and a big glass of milk (YUM!)**

**XOXOXOX  
Rockbandstar**


	3. Just a phone call away

**Just a phone call away**

**A/N- at the bottom**

Bella felt stupid, almost idiotic. She could hear Alice on the other side of the door barking something through the phone, though whatever she was saying was too quick for Bella to understand. She sat on the floor of the bathroom with her head against the door. Looking at herself in the mirror she barely recognized the girl that sat in front of her. For some reason, the thought didn't bother her.

She put on the clothes Alice brought rather quickly before slowly rotating her wrist to check for damage. Luckily, she could tell, it was just a bruise. Running her hands through her tangled hair she pulled it back swiftly into a ponytail and wondered how she was going to get out of going to see Carlisle. She knew she was fine but the pixie was in an uproar.

A gentle knock sounded on the door and Bella stuck her head out through a crack, meeting the gaze of both Rose and Esme.

"May I talk to you for a moment, Bella?" Rose asked. Bella instantly wondered what it is that Rose could possibly have to say to her but nodded her head and slowly opened the door allowing her entrance. The woman entered with grace and quickly sat down on the side of the sink facing her head on.

"What was it that you wanted to discuss, Rose?" Bella asked trying her best not to be nervous about the soft frown that played on the beautiful vampires face.

"Are you ok, and don't lie to me Bella."

A soft sigh escaped Bella's lips and she felt herself once again slide down the door. She definitely was not expecting that.

"I'm fine Rose, my wrist is a bit sore but it is just a bruise."

The woman nodded softly but Bella couldn't help but feel like she was not answering the real question that Rose was trying to ask.

"Look Rose, just say it." Bella stated and her voice sounded bitterer than she knew it could.

"I'm not going to say I told you so, Bella. In fact I am not going to lecture you at all. I just need to know if you are ok. And I know your wrist is just bruised but if you think you are going to get out of seeing Carlisle you will have Alice and Esme on you like there is no tomorrow."

"I figured," Bella sighed softly "and I am fine Rose. To be honest this has been coming for awhile."

"What has been coming for awhile?" Rose asked and she immediately realized that Alice hadn't seen the fight, only the aftermath.

"We split up, Rose." Bella could feel the anger pulsing in her veins again and she tried to suppress it. "I left him."

"WHAT!" She heard someone yell before there was a loud banging on the door followed by a cracking noise and Bella instantly realized the lock on the bathroom door had been broken.

She looked up at the surprised face of Alice and a frowning Esme. "I guess I don't know my own strength." Alice stated smiling softly and shrugging which caused Bella to burst into a fit of giggles.

"What happened?" Esme asked and Bella's laughter instantly stopped and a frown became etched on her face.

"I left Jacob," Bella stated shrugging softly.

"Yes, dear" Esme responded "but why?"

"It's complicated and it has been building up for awhile." She responded "Ever since Amber died he has been difficult, manipulating, and insensitive."

"Who were you on the phone with Alice?" Bella asked not sure if she wanted to know the answer. This separation suddenly complicated everything and one face resonated in her head.

Edward Cullen's

"Jasper," Alice stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "He and the boys are out hunting and he just wanted to check in."

"And what did you tell him Alice?" Bella questioned suddenly feeling her stomach drop. It was almost like she could see the wheels turning in the pixies head and she instantly got worried.

"Alice," she stated warningly "What did you tell him and who was he hunting with?" Her voice seemed to rise as she continued to speak. "I don't need all this extra stress Alice, I have enough to deal with."

"Well," Alice stated "I don't think you have to worry about dealing with Jacob Black."

"Why?" Bella asked hesitantly not sure if she wanted to hear the answer.

"When Emmett, Jasper, and Edward get a hold of him there isn't going to be anything left for you to deal with."

A soft sigh could be heard behind her and Bella turned to look at Rose.

"What?" Rose asked "I love my man."

"Yes, yes," Bella responded "we know. Alice what were you thinking! You know that they can't cross the border! And instigating a fight with a werewolf is going to revoke the treaty! What were you thinking Alice? Really! This could cause a whole lot of problems." Her voice continued to rise and she couldn't stop it from squeaking as she asked the most pertinent question of all. "Alice what exactly did you tell them?"

"Well I told them I had a vision of you running and crying. That you were staying in a motel and that we came to make sure you were ok."

"Is that all you told them?" Bella asked suddenly feeling suspicious "Why would they want to go after Jacob for that?"

"Well," Alice stated softly shuffling her feet "I may have mentioned the bruise on your wrist."

Bell let out a loud whoosh as she processed what Alice said. Leaning her head back against the wall she let out a small string of profanities before looking at Alice.

"And how exactly did they take that bit of news, Alice?" Bella asked brusquely.

A gentle laugh escaped Rose's lips and Bella turned to look at her.

"Well if Edward was with them," Rose stated almost excitedly "I would say that went over quite well." Bella couldn't help but notice the sarcasm in her voice and she winced softly thinking of the look on Edwards face when he found out she was bruised and crying. This definitely wasn't going to go over well.

"I would have to say," Rose stated softly "that there is a very good chance the dog is dead."

**A/N- Well here is chapter 3 and uh oh! Looks like drama is brewing… Expect to see our dear Edward in the next chapter and he will definately be making an entrance !**

**This chapter is dedicated as always to my wonderful beta Ashlyn13 and those who reviewed, or added as a favorite (list below). Thanks so much your reviews are like a heated blanket… they make me feel all warm and fuzzy (lol)**

**Reviews- A Romance Novel, Veronicaloves05, Ashlyn13, **

**Favorites – twilightlover1918, Ashlyn13,**

**Author- Bella Cullen1**


	4. Raindrops

**Raindrops**

**A/N- well here is the long awaited return of Edward (squeals!) I am so excited and as I promised.. he makes an entrance lol… Dedications at the bottom **

Bella sat on the edge of the bed listening to the sound of the rain pattering on the sill of her window. The normally soothing sound did little to calm her nerves and she found herself jumping at any noise that wasn't the rain.

It had been three hours, three long, excruciating hours since they had talked to the boys. A gentle sigh escaped Bella's lips as she turned and looked at the clock once again.

"You would think," Alice stated sounding a bit perturbed herself "that you would be excited to have a little company Bella."

A blush blossomed on her cheeks then and she turned away from the window to look at her friend. "I know and I'm sorry Alice. I am just worried that we haven't heard from them. I don't want anyone to get hurt." And at that Bella's soft voice cracked.

Alice nodded her head silently in agreement before sighing. "Trust me I know how you feel," she sighed "I hate having my visions blocked by that foul smelling dog." She seemed to frown as she spoke and Bella realized she was getting a headache from looking.

"I'm sorry Alice," Bella stated once again frowning as well now. "Why don't we do something instead of just sitting here staring at each other or the walls?"

The pixie squealed then and Bella instantly winced. "Not shopping, Alice."

She couldn't help but smile as Alice began to mumble under her breath "Of course, not shopping! Unbelievable! She doesn't even have any clothes."

Suddenly Alice froze in mid mumble and her eyes glazed over a bit.

"Well, if that isn't timing." Rose joked with Esme causing both the women to smile. After being shaken out of her daze Alice sat for a moment with jaw dropped open in shock and then she began to giggle.

"What is it, Alice?" Rose asked softly.

"Umm." and Alice looked around the room for a minute her eyes meeting Bella's. "Nothing." She stated in a sing song voice as the smile on her face grew larger.

"Why do I get the sneaking suspicion you're lying?" Bella asked raising her eyebrows as she looked at Alice.

"I would never!" Alice stated almost too innocently.

"Now, now girls," Esme reprimanded. "Bella if Alice doesn't want to tell us there is probably a good reason why." Esme looked at Bella for a moment and then frowned. "We really need to take you to see Carlisle to have that wrist checked out; we have put it off too long already." Esme stated causing Bella to wince. She had really hoped that they had forgotten.

"I bet you wish you would have agreed to the shopping now don't you," Alice jibbed causing Bella to scowl slightly at her. This action caused all of them to burst out into a sudden bit of laughter.

The sound of a gentle knock on the door interrupted their laughter and Bella quickly jumped up to get the door. Ignoring the peep hole in the door, after all who could hurt her with three vampires in the room, she whipped open the door and gasped at the sight in front of her.

Edward stood in her doorway sopping wet and his soaking wet hair was in disarray- wild disarray. Rainwater dripped down his face into his eyes. Bella's knees instantly felt weak. "Don't forget to breathe Bella," Alice called from the other room and she felt her face flush as she heard the laughter of the three other vampires.

Edward smiled at her and she felt her face flush even more. "May I come in?" he asked softly looking at her through the tops of his eyelashes causing her heart rate to increase and his smile to spread.

"OH, uh, yeah. Of course!" Bella mumbled moving out of his way and back into the room.

"Hello dear," Esme stated nodding slightly at her son. He looked at her for a moment before frowning slightly and turning to look at Alice. He studied her for a moment before nodding his head. Bella realized that they were having another one of their 'silent conversations.'

"You had a vision?" he asked. She nodded her head but this only caused his brow to furrow more.

"Why are you blocking me Alice?" Edward asked "And stop singing that dreadful song in your head." He scowled as he spoke. She smiled slightly at him before responding. "Trust me, Eddie. This is something you probably don't want to see." As she spoke she wiggled her eyebrows up and down.

He looked to Rose and Esme for a moment before realizing that Alice hadn't told anyone what she saw. "What are you hiding Alice?" he asked.

"Nothing," She replied in a sing-song voice before smiling even larger before stating "We need to go see Carlisle to have Bella's wrist looked at!"

He let out a loud sigh before looking at Bella for a moment. "You haven't had your wrist looked at?" As he asked he reached out quickly and took her hand pressing softly on the tender flesh and looking at it for a moment.

"It's just a bruise," he stated letting a soft sigh escape his lips "but we should probably still put it in a brace for a few days and have Carlisle look at it to make sure. I can't believe that he would lay his hands on you!" And a low growl escaped his lips.

"Edward," Bella stated quickly "I'm fine, I don't need a brace and it was just a misunderstanding." Another growl escaped his lips and he looked up into her eyes. "Don't protect him Bella, he hurt you."

"Probably like you boys hurt him." Rose giggled softly and Edward shot her a glare before turning back to Bella.

"Speaking of which," Bella stated turning to glare at him, "what exactly did happen Edward?"

"I'll make you a deal," Edward stated in a soft alluring voice. She could feel her anger dissipating and she realized he was dazzling her again. "If you ride with me to the hospital and let Carlisle look at your wrist I will tell you in excruciating detail everything that happened."

"Fine," Bella mumbled softly still dazed "anything you want."

He smiled softly at her as he put his hand on her back and led her to the door. Turning once to look at his family he couldn't help but notice the mischievous look on Alice's face.

**Hmm… what exactly is Alice up to and what about that vision? Chapter is dedicated once again to those who reviewed, added to their favorites, or to their alerts.. I love reading what you all think!**

**Reviews- Veronicaloves05, Ashlyn13, and peny11 **

**Alerts- Lovefashionpeace**

**Favorites- none (how sad!)**

**XOXOXO**

**Rockbandstar**


	5. Truly, Honestly

**A/N-at the bottom**

**Truly, Honestly**

_Previously:_

"_Speaking of which," Bella stated turning to glare at him, "what exactly did happen Edward?"_

"_I'll make you a deal," Edward stated in a soft alluring voice. She could feel her anger dissipating and she realized he was dazzling her again. "If you ride with me to the hospital and let Carlisle look at your wrist I will tell you in excruciating detail everything that happened."_

"_Fine," Bella mumbled softly still dazed "anything you want."_

_He smiled softly at her as he put his hand on her back and led her to the door. Turning once to look at his family he couldn't help but notice the mischievous look on Alice's face._

_-_

The drive to the hospital was awkwardly silent and it only added to the tension that Bella was feeling.

"You really didn't have to do this, Edward. Alice and Esme could have taken me." Bella stated as they pulled up to the hospital and into a parking spot.

"I wanted to," he replied softly as he led her in to see Carlisle. "Plus it's like a tradition." He teased.

"Ha, ha, very funny." Bella stated scowling at him for a moment before continuing "let's make fun of the clumsy, danger-magnet, human."

"Sorry," he stated frowning for a moment before shaking his head. "Carlisle is in his office expecting you." Grabbing her good hand he quickly led the way.

It only took Carlisle 30 seconds to diagnose it as "A simple bruise" but he still cautioned Bella to "be careful with it."

Rolling her eyes at the melodrama that was her life she nodded her head agreeing that she would take care of herself.

"Esme tells me that you are living in a motel?" Carlisle asked a frown upon his face as he spoke. "You know that you are more than welcome to stay with us Bella."

"I think," Bella stated softly "that the situation would be awkward for everyone involved."

"Bella, may I talk to you alone for a moment?" Carlisle asked talking more to his son than the girl in front of him. "I want you out of earshot for this Edward, please."

The boy nodded at his father for a moment with a slight scowl on his face replying that he would "be waiting in the car."

"Bella I know that you don't want to go home to Charlie and I understand that, really I do. But a motel is no substitute for a real home. I understand that you are concerned about how this will affect everyone but we are all adults here. Esme and I insist you move in with us until you decide what you are going to do. You are like a daughter to us, Bella, Edward or no Edward that won't change."

"I really appreciate that, Carlisle, and I really appreciate everything you said. I just need some time to think before I make any rash decisions."

The man looked at her for a moment before nodding his head. "I respect that Bella and the offer will always be on the table."

"Thank you, Carlisle." Bella replied "Your family means so much to me."

He smiled softly as he replied "as you do to us, all of us Bella."

She nodded her head softly and turned to leave; reaching for the door Carlisle stopped her for just a moment.

"You should really tell him, Bella."

"Tell him what," she stated turning to look at him once again.

"That you are still in love with him." Carlisle answered.

"It wouldn't matter," Bella stated softly exiting his office without looking back.

When she made it to the car she hopped in slamming the door in the process.

"Well, looks like that went well." Edward murmured.

"Wonderfully!" Bella replied looking at him and tilting her head to the side.

"So are you going to tell me?" she asked.

"Tell you what?" Edward replied starting the car and pulling out of the parking spot.

"Don't play coy or dumb Edward, what did you guys do?"

"What do you mean what did we do?" He asked turning his head to look at her.

"To Jacob, Edward, what did you guys do to Jacob?"

He looked at her for a moment before scowling softly. "We did nothing."

"Nothing? But what was all that talk about going over every excruciating detail."

"You want details Bella!" Edward growled as he looked at her "I wanted to kill the mutt and I would have to, if Carlisle hadn't called and talked some sense into me. He hurt you, Bella, physically hurt you!"

"I know," Bella sighed.

"If he would have phased he could have killed you Bella! Nothing and I mean nothing would have stopped me from ripping the mutt's head from his body."

"So then what took you three hours to get to the motel?" Bella asked softly.

"I had to get the frustration out of my system," Edward replied "I may have taken it out on a few deer and trees. I couldn't risk not being in control it's been awhile since we have been in this close of proximity."

"I know," Bella stated softly as she frowned at looked down at her hands "I am sorry I made this so hard on everyone."

"Bella," Edward stated looking at her for a moment as he pulled off the road and parked next to a park. "What happened?"

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" she replied smiling softly.

"I know I haven't been around much, I really don't understand what happened with you and Jacob. I thought you were happy."

"I was," Bella stated frowning softly. "For awhile anyways."

"What changed?" he asked.

"Everything and nothing." Bella stated running her hands through her hair quickly before turning in the seat to look at him.

"Amber?" he questioned softly noticing the wince on her face at the name.

"I've never been so scared in my entire life, Edward." Bella stated and her voice quivered as she spoke. "To love someone so much and have it all torn out from underneath me. I felt like my life was crumbling around me. It was like there was this huge chunk of me that was missing."

She turned and looked out the window as she continued to talk and her breathing hitched as she continued. "And to have to be the one to find her just lying there," tears began to pour down her face "she was so gray. I have never felt so worthless in my entire life. There was nothing I could do for her, I was too late."

She turned to look at him and he could feel his heart breaking at the devastating look on her face. "I'm sorry, Bella. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I know how it hard it was on Esme and I really can't even begin to fathom the pain you went through."

"Do you know what the hardest part was, Edward? I had never felt more alone in that moment, never felt like more of an outcast in my own life. My husband didn't even console me, too caught up in his own shit to care."

"He was grieving too," Edward stated softly.

"Yeah, by going out with his friends and leaving me home by myself." Bella scoffed then before continuing "When he was home, there was little he could do to console me. He wasn't the one I needed holding me."

He looked confused then and the fact didn't surprise her. "I don't understand." Edward stated running his hand through his hair for a moment before really truly looking at her.

"I suppose you wouldn't, would you?" Bella asked as a gentle sigh escaped her lips. Reaching for the handle of the car door she turned to look at him for just a moment before softly shaking her head. "I can't wait around forever, Edward."

The sound of the door slamming reverberated through the car.

**Dedications-(reviews) veronicaloves05, flower123, and Ashlyn13. (alerts) flower123, Bella Cullen1. (fav.) Bella Cullen1........ You guys rock!**


	6. The Mysterious object

**Chapter 6-The mysterious object**

**Dedications- at the end!**

Bella paid little attention to the fact that she really had no clue where she was, let alone where she was running. Instead she focused on the feeling of her muscles as she put each leg in front of her. She tried not to think about the conversation that had just taken place, but sometimes her mind refused to listen to her heart.

She could hear the steady sound of her breathing and of her feet hitting the pavement which somehow helped to ease her nerves. Looking around her, she realized, she recognized the park from one she had gone to as a child while visiting Charlie. The thought made her sad that she would never be able to share this with her child.

She ran harder.

Taking the first path she found, she ran on instinct. It wasn't until she stopped; stooped over and breathing heavily that she realized where she was. Taking a deep breath she quickly made her way to the door and knocked. The feeling was foreign, but she knew that she couldn't just walk in, not anymore anyways.

"Well, hey Bells," Charlie stated looking at his daughter for a moment before moving out of the way, allowing her to enter.

"Hey Dad," Bella stated brushing her sweat covered hair out of her face and entering the place she had once called home. She was instantly assaulted with memories, ones that she would rather forget.

"So what is with the impromptu visit?" Charlie questioned sounding more concerned than he would normally let on to being.

"I was hoping," Bella replied "that some of my old sweats and stuff were in my room. I could really use a change of clothes."

"Well if they were in your room," Charlie responded heading towards the living room "then I am sure they are probably still there."

Bella let out a gentle sigh as she scanned the living room her eyes meeting her fathers. "Thanks Dad," Bella stated.

"No problem, Bells." Charlie replied his eyes veering back to the baseball game on the television. "Let me know if you need anything else."

"Ok," Bella replied making her way quickly up the stairs and into her old bedroom; happily surprised that she did not trip on the way up. She tried not to let out a shriek when she noticed a figure lying on her bed.

"So," Alice stated flipping something so quickly in her hand Bella wasn't sure what it was "what did my idiotic brother do this time?"

A soft laugh escaped Bella's lips as she looked at the very perturbed expression her friends face. "I have a feeling you already know but are just appeasing me by asking."

"Actually," Alice stated a scowl present on her face "I have no idea. Your future was all clear and pretty, completely perfect and in line. Then you left the motel with him. Now it's all fuzzy again!" This comment caused the girls normally cheerful facade to fall and her scowl to deepen.

"Alice," Bella stated watching the item zoom up and down "I have no idea what is in your hand but you are making me dizzy!"

"Sorry," Alice replied snatching the object out of midair and quickly shoving it into her pocket.

"Anyways as I was saying, what did he do!?" Alice asked.

"Nothing," Bella stated plopping down on her old bed next to the girl and letting out a huge sigh. "That's the problem."

Alice gave the girl a knowing look for a second before replying "I told everyone you never stopped loving him. That if he would quit being stubborn and just give in on this one thing life would be easier for us all. No one listens to the psychic though!" The girl pouted for a moment before continuing.

"I am sorry Bella, not because you are my best friend but because you are my sister. I never pictured the things you would go through or I would have put my foot down a lot sooner. If my brother wasn't so damn stubborn we wouldn't be in this predicament!"

"So," Bella asked choosing to completely ignore the girl's comments "what were you playing with, exactly?"

"OH these," Alice stated holding up a set of keys in her hand and twiddling them back and forth "nothing you need to bother with, Bella. Better not to be an accessory."

"An accessory to what?" Bella asked hesitantly "Those are not your car keys Alice."

"Well," Alice stated smiling softly "these just happen to be the keys to Edward's Vanquish."

"Hitting a little low aren't we Alice?" Bella asked softly knowing how much the car meant to Edward.

"What I haven't decided what I am going to do to it, yet! Better to torture him with visions of what I could do and then make a decision. Plus I have the key, that's all that really matters."

A soft chuckle escaped Bella's lips. "Remind me not to cross you!" Bella replied.

"Yeah well," Alice stated hoping up "maybe my brother should make up his damn mind! I am tired of getting my hopes up when I have visions of you changed, only to have everything go fuzzy hours later." She paced quickly back and forth across the room, a blur to Bella.

"Wait a minute, WHAT?" Bella asked her head whipping back and forth as she tried to keep up with the pixie. "What are you talking about Alice?" Bella asked confused

"Nothing you need to concern yourself with Bella," Alice stated stopping for a moment to look at the girl "you look like you could use a shower and a change of clothes."

As if on cue a bag dropped on the bed in front of her. "I took the liberty of shopping for you." Alice stated.

"Of course you did," Bella replied rolling her eyes slightly.

"What are sisters for?" Alice asked.

"Apparently for buying ridiculously expensive clothes" Bella stated holding up the sweatpants and wrinkling her nose. "Do I want to know how much these cost?"

"Probably not," Alice stated shrugging before continuing "the rest is in your motel room."

"The rest?" Bella asked.

"Of course," Alice stated calmly "you can't just wear sweats."

"Heaven forbid." Bella stated rolling her eyes again.

"You will thank me later!" Alice stated.

"I'm sure I probably will," Bella replied grabbing her stuff and making her way down the hall to the bathroom.

"Trust me, I know all!" Alice hollered after her.

Who was she to argue?

**A/N-I do have to say that I love Alice; you always know that she has some evil scheme up her sleeve!**

**To my **_**reviewers **_**(yourblackmuse, flower123, Ashlyn13, Halocullen, bladzesword, ultimateromantic, and Veronicaloves05)….**

**You are amazing! Your reviews are always delightful to read and I love to hear what you guys have to say! You guys inspire me (aka this chapter is for you!)**

**To the **_**new alert**_** crew (bladzesword, marcuskristafan4ever, ultimateromantic, and silverspirit01)…**

**Welcome to my world (ok so I totally wanted to say Welcome to the Jungle but it just didn't fit lol)! Hopefully this story continues to intrigue and delight you!**

**Rockbandstar**


	7. Be Happy

**Chapter 7- Be Happy**

**A/N- dedications and such at the end!**

_Previously: _

"_Of course," Alice stated calmly "you can't just wear sweats."_

"_Heaven forbid." Bella stated rolling her eyes again._

"_You will thank me later!" Alice stated._

"_I'm sure I probably will," Bella replied grabbing her stuff and making her way down the hall to the bathroom._

"_Trust me, I know all!" Alice hollered after her._

_Who was she to argue?_

_--_

Her shower took longer than it normally did, which seemed to only increase the bad mood that Bella had been in. Throwing the clothes on over her still dripping body she contemplated what her life would have been like if she had never came to Forks.

Throwing her hair up into a ponytail she avoided her room, and the memories they brought, and made her way down the stairs. Making her way into the kitchen, she figured the least she could do was cook Charlie some supper.

It was moments later that she was startled out of her thoughts of what to make, by a voice speaking to her.

"Hey, Bells."

"Jacob," Bella replied turning around to look at her husband, trying to hide the distaste on her face "what are you doing here?"

"I thought we could talk," he replied.

"How did you know I was here?" Bella asked while shooting daggers at her dad who now stood in the entryway to the kitchen.

"Don't blame him, Bells, I just came over. I figured this was where you would be and if you weren't here that I could get Charlie to tell me where you were."

"How convenient for you to show up while I was stopping by to pick up some clothes," Bella seethed looking at her father once more before turning back to the man in front of her.

"Can we go somewhere and talk in private, Bells?" Jacob asked softly.

"What else could you possibly have to say?" Bella asked dropping the rag she was holding in her hands.

"Let's go for a walk, I promise to have you back shortly?" Jacob responded directing the question more at Charlie than at her.

"FINE" Bella stated throwing her hands in the air in exasperation. "Let's just get this over with."

She made her way quickly out of the house and headed towards the road stopping for a moment to look up at the darkening sky.

He reached the spot next to her and they stood for a moment not saying anything. The night slowly drew upon them before one of them spoke.

"I'm sorry," Jacob stated.

"I know," Bella replied actually looking at him now.

"Let me finish, Bells, please." Jacob stated his face scrunching up for a moment before continuing "I'm sorry for a lot of things, Bells, not just what you might think. I'm sorry for not being there when you needed me to be. I'm sorry for not treating you as good as I should have at the time; I realize how stupid I was now."

He took a deep breath and Bella realized it sounded ragged before he continued. "I'm sorry for not being able to let you go, Bells." She turned to look at him, confusion on her face, as he continued to speak. "I knew how much you loved him, but I still relished the fact that you left him for me. Maybe if I would have paid closer attention I would have noticed how much it was killing you to be away from him."

A loud gasp escaped Bella's lips as he continued.

"I know I should never have asked you to stay away from them, any of them. I knew how much they all meant to you, but still nagged you about it until you let yourself drift away from them. Mostly I'm sorry that I couldn't be a better friend for you because I was too focused on what it meant for me that you two were through."

"You've known?" Bella asked "All this time."

"I told myself you were safer with me, safer with the pack. That if we had a baby things would turn around, you would be happy again. And you were, at least for awhile until we lost her."

"I did love you," Bella stated "love her."

"I know," Jacob stated looking down for a moment. "I told myself that I was ok with being second in your heart and that you would learn to love me just as much. I realize now how foolish I was, fighting a losing battle. In the end my selfishness ended up hurting us all."

"I don't blame you," Bella stated "I know that it is hard to hear, but I never did."

"I know," Jacob stated "and I love you all the more for it."

"Jacob," Bella sighed softly.

"Can I ask you one thing?" Jacob asked "There is one thing I have always wanted to know but have never had the courage to ask."

"Of course," she stated placing her hand on his shoulder.

"Why did you leave him?" Jacob asked "What happened?"

"That's something I really think you don't want to know the answer to." Bella stated looking at him for a moment before letting out a sigh. "He wouldn't change me, Jake. He didn't want to make me go through that. He always thought of himself as a monster.'"

"So he was trying to protect you and you left him. Why am I not surprised?" Jacob muttered softly to himself before speaking to her his anger somewhat showing through. "How could _you_ want _that_?"

"I loved him," Bella stated softly "I wanted to spend eternity with him. There were no downsides, there was only him. He wanted to keep me human and I guess that just confirmed my feelings that I wasn't good enough, so I left."

"I think," Jacob stated "I always knew or at least had some idea. I just never wanted to confirm my worst fears."

"Would it really be that bad?" Bella asked "I would still be me, just a little more indestructible."

"We all know you could use a little help in that area," Jacob stated tapping her slightly on the arm.

"I'm sorry for everything, Jacob." Bella stated "I need you to know that."

"I do," Jacob stated "so now what?"

"I'm really not sure," Bella stated shrugging "but that thought alone is a little thrilling in itself."

"Are you going to get back together with _him_?"

"I'm not really sure he wants me that way anymore," Bella sighed "so I'm not really sure I can answer that."

"I saw the way he looked at you," Jacob stated "the way he always looked at you. I don't think that you have anything to worry about."

"The way he looked at me?" Bella asked softly.

"Yeah," Jacob stated "like you were the only one in the world worth living for."

"Jacob" Bella stated softly pausing for a moment as her voice wavered with emotion "thank you."

"I can't be your friend Bella, you know that."

"I know," she replied her voice wavering "I understand."

"Promise me one thing, though."

"Anything."

"Be happy, Bella." Jacob stated softly turning and making his way down the road.

"You too, Jake" Bella called to him, and he turned back once to nod at her.

She watched him as he ran down the street and quickly disappeared.

**Dedications:**

**Reviews: Veronicaloves05, cookieMonsterxx3, flower123, Ashlyn13, and A Romance Novel **

OK, seriously you guys are freaking awesome and I loved reading what you wrote! You amaze and amuse me! Oh and Happy (late) B-Day Veronicaloves05 (I hope it was grand!)

**Alerts: truelove953**

Yay! Enjoy this new tidbit!

**Favorites: Veronicaloves05, and manvir**

Awww I heart you!

**Be looking forward to our dear Edward coming back soon… and what about that evil plan of Alice's? **

**Rockbandstar**


	8. Let Us Pretend

**A/N-so this is like my favorite chapter (let us see if you agree!)**

**Dedications and notes at the bottom!**

**Chapter 8-Let us pretend**

She stood on the sidewalk staring at the stars. For what seemed to be the second time in her life she really had no idea what she was going to do. It was thrilling and terrifying at the same time.

Pulling her hair out of her ponytail she lay back on the moist grass and continued to look up into the sky, silently hoping that by some stroke of luck she would find what she was looking for. She could feel the dew on the grass soaking through her clothes and making her cold, she ignored it.

"You know," a voice stated next to her "as a child I used to look up at the stars and make wishes on them."

"And did it work?" Bella asked turning to look at the man now sitting next to her.

"It depended on what I wished for. Something trivial like a toy, I almost always got. Other things were not so easy to attain."

"I miss that innocence of childhood," Bella stated looking up into the sky frowning slightly. "As you get older things just seem to get more complicated."

"They certainly do," he replied.

"How long have you been standing there?" Bella asked turning and looking at him.

"Since Alice said that she saw you disappear." Edward replied.

"And how much of that conversation did you hear?" she asked softly.

"Most of it," he admitted softly "more than you probably wanted me to."

A gentle sigh escaped her lips and she was at a loss for words. Looking at the first star she saw she closed her eyes and silently made a wish.

"What are you doing?" he asked amusement in his voice.

"Shh, don't interrupt me." Bella replied whispering "I'm wishing on a star."

She could feel him move to lie down next to her and she opened her eyes slightly to look at him. He lay next to her his eyes closed tightly lips moving softly.

Bella felt a small chuckle escape her lips as she watched him.

"What are you doing?" she asked softly.

"I figured if you could make a wish, so could I." Edward stated opening his eyes softly. He reached over and brushed a strand of hair from her face "It's only fair after all."

"And what did you wish for?" Bella asked.

"I can't tell you or it won't come true." He replied smiling cheekily as he spoke.

"Fine then," Bella replied pouting slightly causing him to chuckle.

"Well are you going to tell me what you wished for?" he responded.

"Nope." Bella stated popping the p.

"Are we going to talk about what I overheard then," Edward asked sitting up slightly and looking down at her.

Her nose scrunched up in response before she answered him. "Can't we just lie like this for awhile and forget about the world, at least for a little while?"

"Yes, we can." Edward replied "But we still need to talk about it and I won't forget that no matter how much you delay."

"I know," Bella sighed "but for right now just let me pretend."

"Silly, Bella." Edward replied shaking his head while lying down once again. "For now then, let us pretend." He whispered. He reached over and took her hand gently squeezing it before bringing it up and kissing it softly.

She could feel her heart rate accelerate and she turned her head to look at him. The dim light from the sliver of moon and the stars lit up his face just enough that she could see him. "What are you doing?" she asked and she realized how heavily she was breathing.

"I thought we said we were pretending." Edward stated and she noticed the crooked smile that she had always loved.

"Right," Bella replied and she was surprised to notice how nervous she sounded. He laughed softly at the reply bringing so many memories to her mind.

"What are you thinking about right now?" he asked her.

"You," she replied honestly, blushing slightly as she did so.

"Don't be embarrassed," Edward replied brushing his hand across her cheek "I think about you all the time."

"Edward," she replied, and she realized just how breathy it sounded. Reaching over she brushed a few stray strands of hair off his forehead letting her hand linger for a moment.

"Bella," Edward replied back softly pushing his face into her hand so that she was cupping it. "I missed you."

"Oh, Edward, I missed you too." Bella replied softly fighting back tears. "More than you know."

"I think after your little talk with Jacob I am beginning to believe that." He replied so softly she almost didn't hear him.

"Edward are we still pretending?" Bella asked softly.

"I'm not." Edward stated looking in her eyes. "I can't pretend I didn't hear what you said Bella."

"And what is it that you heard." Bella asked her eyes shining with unshed tears.

"Oh my Bella, please don't cry." Edward stated rubbing her cheek softly. "I can't take it when you cry."

"Tell me, Edward. Tell me what you heard."

"You love me," he whispered kissing her softly on the forehead before repeating himself "after everything you still love me."

"I do," Bella replied the tears now falling down her face "it's always been you, Edward."

"Always?" he questioned softly.

"Always," Bella stated her eyes shining as they looked up into his.

"Jacob was right about one thing, Bella. You are the only one worth living for. I do love you, I always have. I will always want you, always. I never should have let you walk out that door. I never should have made you doubt my love for you. It is I who am not good enough for you Bella. I'm the one that put us in this position. But still you love me as I love you."

He leaned in and slowly kissed the tears from her cheeks.

"You have been through so much pain because of me. I am so sorry my love."

"I needed you Edward and you weren't there."

"I know," he replied running his fingers along her eyelids brushing the new tears away "never again."

He leaned down and placed a trail of soft kisses on her face touching her forehead, her eyelids, her nose, and her cheeks.

"Edward," Bella gasped "just kiss me already."

He chuckled for a moment before making his way to her lips. "As you wish my love," he whispered as he leaned down and met his lips with hers.

**I could sit and spew on and on but this time I think I will let my writing do the talking! I'm going away for the weekend so expect an update Monday!**

**Dedications: (and I'm always good for some cheesy commentary lol)**

**To my reviewers: peny11, flower123, Cookiemonsterxx3, A Romance Novel, Veronicaloves05, and Ashlyn13**

This chapter is truly dedicated to you! Your reviews inspire me and help motivate me to write (and update quickly)… Hopefully this chapter lives up to your expectations!!

**Alerts: sunshinemd23, and Dpichette**

"I'm dancing in the streets"

**Favorites: ColemanTwilighter, and Soph778 **

"I love you, you love me!" *shivers* I never was a big Barney fan…. But still Feel the love!


	9. Reality

**Chapter 9- Reality**

_Previously:_

"_I needed you Edward and you weren't there."_

"_I know," he replied running his fingers along her eyelids brushing the new tears away "never again."_

_He leaned down and placed a trail of soft kisses on her face touching her forehead, her eyelids, her nose, and her cheeks._

"_Edward," Bella gasped "just kiss me already."_

_He chuckled for a moment before making his way to her lips. "As you wish my love," he whispered as he leaned down and met his lips with hers._

_--_

Bella pulled back for just a moment looking into his eyes before throwing herself into the kiss. She could feel the tears streaking down her face and soon after his hands wiping them away.

She knew that any second he would be pulling away but let herself get lost in the moment. His hand gently cupped her face and she felt him slowly pulling away. Reaching down he grabbed her hand and placed a gentle kiss on her wrist.

She looked at her wrist for a moment before raising her eyes and looking him in the eyes. A soft sigh escaped her lips.

"I think we need to talk." Edward stated softly.

"How did I know you were going to say that?" Bella asked scowling slightly.

A small laugh escaped his lips and he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"Because you know me" Edward replied. "Bella is this really what you want?"

"By this, do you mean us?" Bella asked squinting to try and see him clearer in the dark.

She could hear a soft laugh escape his lips and she bypassed her first question.

"Of course, I love you Edward."

"As I, you" Edward replied "but are you really willing to give up the chance of having another child? I can't give that to you, Bella."

"I know," Bella stated turning away from him as she spoke "but it doesn't matter Edward. I need you, I love you. When I lost you it just about killed me, but when I lost her my world felt over. In all honesty I don't think I can go through that again, it would kill me."

"I'm so sorry you had to go through that Bella," Edward stated pulling her back into him "so terribly sorry."

"I know," Bella stated turning to look at him "but we need to move on, I need to move on and to do that I need you."

"As long as you want me I will be here, you know that Bella."

They sat in a comfortable silence both reflecting on the things they had heard. Bella knew it was getting late but that fact did little to make her tired.

"Charlie is wondering where you went to." Edward stated pulling Bella out of her thoughts.

"I should probably head in." she replied "I think I am just going to stay here tonight. Will you stay with me?"

"Of course," he replied smiling softly "just like the old days."

She nodded her head turning to look at him for a moment "just like the old days."

Bella entered the house, avoiding a conversation with Charlie by stating that she was just "too tired" to hash over the details of what her and Jake discussed. Surprisingly Charlie didn't argue.

She made her way up the stairs quickly, opening the window in her room, before heading down the hall to the bathroom to get ready for bed.

Bella skipped the shower, having showered earlier; instead she sat on the edge of the tub and thought about the events of the day.

Losing track of time, she was startled out of her thoughts by the sound of Charlie coming up the stairs. Making her way to her room, she closed the door behind her, and rested her head against the frame.

"What are you thinking about?" Edward asked as he lounged on her rocking chair smiling at the dazed look on her face.

"I'm wondering how Jacob is going to take the news of us getting back together."

"Well from his thoughts what he said was honest. He wants a clean break. He really does want you to be happy Bella."

"I want him to be happy too, Edward. He gave me Amber and for that I will always be grateful."

"As will I," Edward stated smiling softly.

"Do you know that I came to visit you at the hospital after you had delivered her?" Edward asked.

"No," Bella stated "why did I not see you?"

"I didn't want it to be an issue. I just wanted to make sure that you two were ok so I snuck my head in when you were all sleeping. I'm sure Jacob noticed my smell in the morning but I was already gone."

"Why didn't you say something?" Bella asked "You could have woken me up; I was so disappointed thinking that you didn't want to come and meet her."

"Bella she was a part of you, I couldn't not see her no matter what you thought."

A soft sigh escaped Bella's lips as she walked over and hopped into bed.

"What's the matter?" Edward asked softly now sitting next to her.

"Nothing, it's just we wasted all those years, Edward."

"I know," he stated frowning softly "never again."

"This time I'm not letting you go." Bella stated.

"Me?" Edward asked chuckling "I'm the one who's not letting you go, Bella."

"I'm ok with that," Bella stated leaning over and placing a kiss on his cheek.

"So, tomorrow is back to reality?" Edward asked.

"Tomorrow is back to the motel," Bella stated scrunching up her nose in distaste.

"I don't understand why you don't take up Carlisle's offer to move in with us?" Edward asked.

"You weren't supposed to be listening!" Bella stated holding her finger at him with a look of surprise on her face.

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Bella." He replied smiling softly. "You're really tired, you should go to bed."

Bella shook her head in amazement as she lay back against her pillow and stared at the ceiling. The last thing she remembered was the gentle sound of Edward humming her lullaby next to her.

**Dedications:**

**Reviews: flower123, CookieMonsterxx3, vampirelover13, Veronicaloves05, Lily Swan, ****TwilighterAnonymous89, Raven Macbeth, Ashlyn13, and ultimateromantic**

"Can you feel the love tonight?" Because I certainly can! You guys made my weekend! I loved reading what you had to say!

**Alerts: vampirelover13, collene3494, and ****TwilighterAnonymous89**

Welcome to my world!

**Favorites: vampirelover13, bonnysammy, ****TwilighterAnonymous89, and Raven Macbeth**

OK… I'm running out of clever cute things to say… so I'll just make is simple… Thanks! It means a lot to me that you love my story so much!

**For those of you who added me as one of their favorite authors (you know who you are!) all I can really truly say is thank you! It means a lot that you like me that much!**

**To all of you, who reviewed, alerted, added as a favorite, ect:**

**It means a lot to me that not only do you like my writing style but you like it enough to say hey this girl is pretty awesome… Well I think you're awesome too! I'm happy you're taking this journey with me!**

**Rockbandstar**


	10. The Plan Part 1

**Chapter 10- The Plan part 1**

_Previously:_

"_So, tomorrow is back to reality?" Edward asked._

"_Tomorrow is back to the motel," Bella stated scrunching up her nose in distaste._

"_I don't understand why you don't take up Carlisle's offer to move in with us?" Edward asked._

"_You weren't supposed to be listening!" Bella stated holding her finger at him with a look of surprise on her face._

"_I have no idea what you are talking about, Bella." He replied smiling softly. "You're really tired, you should go to bed."_

_Bella shook her head in amazement as she lay back against her pillow and stared at the ceiling. The last thing she remembered was the gentle sound of Edward humming her lullaby next to her._

---

"Bella," A voice called softly next to her "oh Bella."

"Just let me do it!" she heard another voice say as she felt her bed shift for a moment. "BELLA WAKEY WAKEY!"

She burrowed deeper into the blankets that were surrounding her letting a soft groan out in despair. Clenching her eyes tighter she pulled the pillow over her head.

"Well that worked well," the man replied laughing and she heard the girl growl. "Fine, I will do this my way then!"

She wasn't prepared for the covers to be ripped off of her or for her bed to begin bouncing up and down. "WAKE UP!" Alice yelled tugging at the pillow.

"Fine," Bella replied chucking the pillow at Alice as she rolled over "I'm up I'm up."

"It took you long enough," Emmett stated scoffing in a teasing manner. "Our little Eddie keep you up late?" He seemed to laugh for a minute at his joke before plopping down next to her.

"Speaking of Edward," Alice stated handing Bella a note "he left this for you. He really didn't want to leave but Emmett, Jasper, and I forced him too. He really needed to go hunting."

She grabbed the note scanning it quickly before looking up at Alice. "He can't be serious!" Bella stated scoffing.

"What does it say?" Emmett asked sounding like a little child as he reached over ripping it out of Bella's hands.

"Blah blah blabbity blah. Love you, some more mushy crap." Emmett muttered reading before something peaked his interest "Were going out tonight?" Emmett asked Alice turning to look at her.

"That we are!" Alice squealed "And that means we need to get our little Bella here an outfit."

"Shopping? Seriously I stayed behind to go _shopping_?" Emmett scoffed throwing the note down on her comforter. "I think I am going to go catch up with Rose," Emmett stated smiling largely as he waggled his eyebrows up and down. "Empty house, if you know what I mean!"

He jumped out of the window before either Alice or Bella could respond. Bella turned looking back at Alice and the girl had a huge smile on her face.

"That note was sweet." Alice stated before hopping up "To save some time I am just going to answer your questions. No it was not a dream, yes it really happened, and yes it took all three of us to pry Edward from your bed." Alice snickered for a moment before continuing "Yes you are going out tonight, whether you want to or not, I have an outfit picked out for you right here."

"Wait a minute I thought you said…" Bella stated but was interrupted as Alice continued.

"I just said that to get Emmett out of here," she smiled for a moment chuckling "I wanted some girl time." Alice held up a small bag "I thought I could give you a manicure and pedicure and we could talk. It has been forever since the two of us have been able to hang out and I missed you."

"Alice I missed you too!" Bella stated brushing her hair out of her face as she sat up "I really messed things up."

"No," Alice stated "my stubborn ass brother messed things up. But we're going to be changing his opinions on a few things very soon!"

"What do you have planned?" Bella asked looking at the girl worriedly for a moment.

"Nothing to worry your pretty little head with." Alice replied smirking at her. "So tell me about last night, that was some kiss!"

"You saw that?!" Bella asked a bright blush flushing her cheeks.

Alice laughed for a moment before replying "I most certainly did. It truly was a perfect moment" Alice sighed for a moment "underneath the stars. I really couldn't have planned it better!"

"What do you mean planned it?!" Bella asked scowling.

"It's not like you didn't like it!" Alice stated laughing "Or like I forced you two to do anything. I just made the opportunity a possibility."

"And how exactly did you do that?" Bella asked glaring at her friend for a moment.

"Well it isn't my fault how protective Edward is of you. How was I to know that if I mentioned the fact that your future disappeared while you were home that he would run right over here to make sure you were ok? Really it was totally unpredictable."

"Alice," Bella stated laughing "you're a psychic."

"Do you regret last night?" Alice asked looking Bella pointedly in the eyes.

"No." Bella replied smiling as she thought about it.

"Then quit complaining!" Alice stated laughing. "Oh and you can thank me later!"

Both girls burst into a fit of giggles for a moment before conversation continued.

"He really does love you, Bella."

"I know," she replied softly "I love him too."

"You love him and he loves you. I love you too, Bella, you know that right?!"

"Aw Alice I love you too, you're like a sister to me."

"You love me enough to never question my judgment right?" Alice asked making a cute puppy dog face.

"I suppose I can play along for the time being," Bella stated having a hard time saying no to Alice when she made that face.

"So do you want to see what you are wearing tonight?"

"Where exactly are we going?" Bella asked playing with the ends of her hair as she spoke.

"Well," Alice stated looking up at Bella, "remember you promised you wouldn't question my judgment."

"Alice," Bella stated in a warning tone.

"We're going to this new restaurant that opened up in Port Angeles, and don't say we don't eat. You do and we are more than willing to take you out."

"So we are going to dinner?" Bella asked.

"Right," Alice stated before mumbling "and then we are going dancing."

"Dancing!" Bella stated feeling her heart race "Alice I can't dance. I'm perpetually klutzy; this is not a good idea. How did you get Edward to agree?"

A soft snicker escaped Alice's lips before she responded "I have my ways."

"Can you promise me that I will not get hurt or hurt anyone tonight?" Bella asked softly sighing.

Alice closed her eyes for a moment before her smile became even larger. "Not even a fly will be harmed."

"Fine," Bella stated softly in defeat.

"Good because Edward is going to have a heart attack when he sees you in this." Alice stated pulling out a blue dress from the garment bag on the edge of her bed.

"Alice," Bella stated "does it have to be a dress?"

"Trust me," Alice stated snickering again "It's all part of the plan."

"This mysterious plan you keep talking about is starting to scare me."

Alice ignored her last comment and held the dress up so Bella could really see it.

"I am not wearing that Alice!" Bella exclaimed "It has like NO back."

"That's kind of the point," Alice stated sounding annoyed "I thought you were going to trust me."

"I do trust you Alice," Bella stated pouting slightly before Alice interrupted.

"I even got small heels that not even you could trip in" Alice stated holding up a matching pair of shoes.

"I don't really even have a say do I?" Bella asked sighing as she pulled her hair back and stood up from the bed.

"Nope," Alice replied "we can do this the easy or the hard way, but one way or another you are coming with us tonight and you are wearing this dress."

"Fine," Bella replied throwing her hands in the air "I'm going to shower."

"You do that!" Alice called after her laughing.

**Dedications:**

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**Holy guacamole! Ok in all honesty I can't stand guacamole but I love that saying lol. I'm so happy you all love this story as much as I do! You flooded my email inbox and made my day! You guys rock!**

**Rockbandstar**


	11. The Reveal

**Quick Authors Note- I have a horrible cold and wrote this while on cold medicine (which in all honesty I feel makes me write funny). I sent it to my beta and she loved it though, so hopefully you will as well!**

**Chapter 11- The Reveal**

_Previously:_

"_I am not wearing that Alice!" Bella exclaimed "It has like NO back."_

"_That's kind of the point," Alice stated sounding annoyed "I thought you were going to trust me."_

"_I do trust you Alice," Bella stated pouting slightly before Alice interrupted._

"_I even got small heels that not even you could trip in" Alice stated holding up a matching pair of shoes._

"_I don't really even have a say do I?" Bella asked sighing as she pulled her hair back and stood up from the bed._

"_Nope," Alice replied "we can do this the easy or the hard way, but one way or another you are coming with us tonight and you are wearing this dress."_

"_Fine," Bella replied throwing her hands in the air "I'm going to shower."_

"_You do that!" Alice called after her laughing._

_--_

Bella stood in front of the mirror staring at her reflection. She could feel the steady pounding of her heart matching the rhythm of the song that Alice was now blaring in the other room. The more she thought about it, the more she couldn't believe that Alice had talked her into this. She was by no means a timid young girl anymore, but she still had some preservation skills left in her. Currently they were telling her that this was a very bad idea.

"Can you turn that radio down?" Bella asked noticing how nervous her voice sounded.

"Relax, Bella" Alice stated popping her head into the bathroom and looking her up and down "I am so getting a front row seat for this."

"Alice," Bella cried twirling once again and looking at the back of the dress "you are not helping."

"Do I need to get Jasper, Bella, or are you going to calm down on your own?"

Her breath came out shaky and for a moment she wondered if she was going to have a panic attack.

"Bella," Alice stated grabbing her friend's hands and pulling her into a hug "you look gorgeous, you have nothing to worry about, Edward is going to flip out, and you need to trust me."

Bella nodded her head softly turning and walking from the bathroom. Closing her eyes she steadied her breathing and took a moment to calm her nerves.

"Wait!" Alice squealed before tearing down the stairs in front of her. She could momentarily hear Alice reprimanding her brother to "stay out of her head" before calling Bella down the stairs.

She took the stairs slowly making sure to stay steady on the small heels Alice had put her in. She was momentarily grateful for the fact that Charlie was currently out fishing with Billy because she knew he would have a problem with her in this outfit.

She didn't even make it half way down the stairs before she could hear Emmett's cat calls and whistles and she chuckled silently thanking him for making light of the situation.

"Damn, Bella." Emmett called "Look at those legs."

She could feel her cheeks flush and she looked up from the stairs and into the eyes of the five people waiting at the bottom of the steps for her.

"Thanks, Emmett." Bella replied her blush becoming deeper red "I think."

"Oh trust me it is no problem." Emmett stated receiving a smack on the back of his head by Rose. Bella couldn't help but laugh. "What?" Emmett asked shrugging "Who knew running did a body such good."

"That's _quite enough_, Emmett." Edward stated scowling at his brother before turning to look at Bella and smiling brightly at her.

"You guys haven't even seen the best part!" Alice cried before looking at her brother and winking at him. "Turn around Bella."

Grabbing a hold of the railing so she didn't lose her balance Bella turned so they could all see the back of the dress. She was unprepared for the small moan that she faintly heard, and knew to belong to just one man.

She couldn't help the small smile that came upon her face but was surprised when a bright flash went off followed by a cracking noise.

Turning around she found a cell phone crumpled on the floor and a pouting Emmett looking down at it.

"What did you do, Emmett?" Bella asked.

"I was taking a picture" Emmett replied pointing to his cell phone in sadness. "Rose look what Edward did to my cell phone!"

Rose looked at him for a moment before shaking her head "serves you right!"

A small chuckle escaped Bella's lips at his childish antics before she made her way down the last two steps to meet the group her eyes never leaving Edwards.

Bella couldn't help but chuckle at the fact that Alice stood by Jasper hopping up in down in excitement. She took the last two steps to meet Edward and gently pulled him into a hug hearing him take in a large gulp of air.

"So," Bella stated looking up at him through her eyelashes "what do you think?" She could feel his cool breath on her cheek causing her heart to flutter, and she waited for his response.

"I think," Edward replied placing his hand on her bare back "I am going to be buying Alice a very nice present."

The little pixies bright squeal caused all of them to laugh and seemed to somewhat break the tension in the air that Bella was now feeling.

"Shall we be off?" Edward asked looking at his Alice for a moment before smiling and then nodding.

"No silent conversations!" Emmett called making a pouting face as he made his way to the door grabbing Bella and sticking his tongue out at Edward in the process.

"EMMETT" Bella yelled grabbing onto the hem of her dress and trying to keep herself covered "put me down!"

He just let out a jovial laugh as he carefully threw her in the front seat of the car causing her to squeal.

"Look it Eddie. I got her squealing for me already."

Bella could hear a low growl coming from the house and Emmett turned to look at her smiling and winking before running and hoping into his jeep to meet up with Rose.

She could hear Edward murmuring under his breath as he hoped in the car next to her before he growled once again.

"I can still hear you!" he scowled looking through his mirror "I wonder if Rose would like to know what you are thinking right now." After a moment of silence he smiled and stated "that's what I thought."

Turning to look at Bella he took a deep breath before leaning over and placing a gentle kiss on her lips.

"You look beautiful. I am sorry about him."

"Thank you," Bella replied blushing "its fine. He is just trying to get to you."

"That he is," Edward replied smiling softly "time to get food for the human."

Bella let out a gentle sigh causing Edward to turn and look at her.

"I didn't mean it like that." Edward stated frowning softly.

"I know," Bella replied turning to look at him more closely as he drove. "How did Alice get you to agree to this?"

"It's Alice," Edward replied smiling "she has her ways."

"I am well aware of her ways, Edward." Bella replied laughing "I am just wondering if you got the keys to your vanquish back."

"You know where the keys to my vanquish are?" Edward asked turning to look at her once again. His eyes were blacker and Bella wondered if it had to do with his car or the fact that they hadn't been in close proximity for awhile.

"Umm, no?" Bella stated "Alice told me that you were looking for them."

"Alice Cullen," Edward stated looking at the car in front of him and frowning. "I should have figured as much. Why is Alice picturing destroying my car in various ways?"

"No clue," Bella replied looking at the car in front of them and mentally reminding herself to apologize to Alice later. . Her cheeks flushed and she turned to look out the window, she was surprised to find that they were almost there.

Edward started chuckling softly and turned to look at Bella for a moment before pulling to a stop in front of the restaurant.

"Bella," Edward stated turning and placing a hand on her cheek.

"Yes?" Bella asked her cheeks flushing.

He leaned over and kissed her quickly but intensely. She felt her cheeks flush and her heart speedup.

"That dress is wonderful, but don't forget two can play at this game."

"What game?" Bella asked looking at him as he smirked and hopped out of the car walking around to open her door.

"Dinner awaits, love, let's go."

**Dedications:**

**Reviews: bleedinglove93, flower123, CookieMonsterxx3, TwilighterAnonymous89, Veronicaloves05, 1baby-girl1, Ashylyn13, and ultimateromantic**

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My creativity is out the window today (I blame my cold and fuzzy brain!). Anyways hope you loved the new chapter. I appreciate you guys!

**Rockbandstar**


	12. The Pit

**Chapter 12- The Pit**

**A/N- sorry for the late update I have been sick with pneumonia and it kind of takes a lot out of you lol… anyways I am starting to feel a bit better so hopefully I can kick this thing! Special shout out to my beta Ashlyn13 who is absolutely amazing!**

_Previously:_

_Edward started chuckling softly and turned to look at Bella for a moment before pulling to a stop in front of the restaurant. _

"_Bella," Edward stated turning and placing a hand on her cheek._

"_Yes?" Bella asked her cheeks flushing._

_He leaned over and kissed her quickly but intensely. She felt her cheeks flush and her heart speedup. _

"_That dress is wonderful, but don't forget two can play at this game."_

"_What game?" Bella asked looking at him as he smirked and hopped out of the car walking around to open her door._

"_Dinner awaits, love, let's go."_

_---_

They were all packed into a small booth at the restaurant and quickly ordered their food. Dinner was rather awkward with more than one person pawning their food off on Bella to "try."

She couldn't help but chuckle at the fact that Emmett was actually eating his food though. This fact caused the others to all grimace but Bella to smile.

He shrugged and responded "what I thought I would try it?"

Bella tried not to picture what he would have to do with the food later, as it involved some form of hacking it up and instead focused on the food on her plate. It was rather delicious.

After an interesting dinner that consisted mainly of all of them watching her and Emmett eat and a quick trip to the restroom by Emmett they made their way to the cars.

The drive with Edward was silent and did little to assuage her confusion from their conversation earlier. They held hands as Edward drove and Bella couldn't help but run her fingers over the familiar skin.

"That still feels amazing." Edward stated turning to look at her and smiling. This caused her to blush and him to chuckle.

They arrived at The Pit shortly afterwards and quickly parked their car meeting up with the others and making their way to the door.

They entered the club and Bella was surprised as she took in her surroundings. A bar was located in the center of the floor with a dance floor around it. Tables and booths were scattered on the edges of the room and the whole area was faintly lit with flashing lights.

The music pulsed through the room and seemed to reverberate in Bella's chest and she was surprised that she liked the feeling.

"Bella," Alice yelled at her grabbing her hand and pulling her from Edward "come dance with me!"

"Alice, I don't dance." Bella protested as she was pulled onto the floor and away from the group.

"You do now!" Alice stated staring at her for a moment before winking and pulling her into the crowd of people.

Alice held onto her hands and swung her arms in the air trying to get Bella to loosen up, causing Bella to laugh. Soon enough Bella was somewhat dancing and actually having a good time.

"I'm going to get you a drink!" Alice stated laughing as she danced her way towards the bar leaving Bella alone in the crowd of people.

The next thing she felt were two arms snake around her waist and she turned to look at the guy now holding her.

"Bella is it?" he asked twirling her around and causing her to stumble a bit.

"Yes," Bella stated hesitantly "and you are?"

"Trey," The man replied as he held his hand out for her to shake. "I overheard your little friend call you that."

"Well it is my name." Bella replied pulling away slightly "Speaking of I think I am going to go and look for Alice, thanks for the dance."

"Aw," he replied grabbing onto her waist and pulling her to him "but we were just getting started." He started to pull her towards one of the back booths and she tried to pull out of his grasp.

"No," a man's voice stated fiercely and she recognized it immediately. "I think you were finished."

She turned to look at Edward for a moment in relief before noticing the expression on his face.

"I'm fine Edward," Bella stated walking towards him slowly "no harm done. Let's just go back to the group."

He leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her head as he turned his gaze onto the man once again. "I think you were leaving." Edward stated growlingly as he wrapped his arm around Bella.

"Right," the man stated looking at the two of them for a moment before walking away rather quickly.

"Are you alright?" Edward asked as he pulled her to him and ran his hand through her hair.

"I'm fine." Bella stated surprised at how calm she actually felt.

"You can't even begin to imagine what he was thinking." Edward scowled pulling her still closer to him.

"I'm ok Edward," Bella stated looking up into his darkened eyes. "I promise you I am ok."

"Where is Alice anyways?" Edward asked looking around him "She promised me that she would stay by your side."

"She went to get me something to drink." Bella stated pointing towards the bar in the middle of the room.

Edward frowned for a moment before turning to look at Bella. "You're not leaving my side the rest of the night."

"OK!" Bella replied blushing as her mind ran a mile a minute. She could feel the cold of his hand on her exposed back and she was surprised to notice that she was warm.

"Here is your drink, Bella!" Alice stated popping up next to them and handing a rather large glass of something to Bella.

"Alice," Edward stated staring at his sister for a moment "are you trying to get her drunk?"

"Not exactly," Alice stated smirking at him for a moment before her smile became even larger.

"I'm going to go dance with Jasper you two have fun!" And with that Alice disappeared.

"She is definitely up to something." Edward mumbled under his breath as Bella played with the straw of her drink causing her to laugh.

"I've learned to just go with the flow with Alice." Bella replied grabbing onto Edward's arm with her free hand. "Plus," Bella replied pulling him closer to her "has she steered you wrong yet?"

A small laugh escaped Edward's lips as he looked down at the girl in front of him. "I'm not answering that." He replied.

"Fine," Bella replied batting her eyelashes at him "will you dance with me?"

"I thought you didn't dance." He replied smirking at her as he pulled her closer and wrapped both his arms around her "Plus you have a drink in your hands."

"I will always dance with you, Edward." Bella replied setting her drink on a nearby table before pulling him towards the floor.

A laugh escaped his lips as he followed her onto the floor causing her to smile as well. Bella was somewhat grateful that the song switched to a slow song.

She felt Edward pull her to him tightly and he wrapped his arms around her his palms resting on the bare of her back. She couldn't help but blush.

"I've missed you." Bella stated softly looking up into his eyes "I've missed us, this."

They moved together slowly to the beat and Bella could feel her heart in her eardrums as he looked down at her. His smile was so large that she felt her breathing stutter for a moment before picking up.

"I've missed you too, Bella." Edward replied whispering in her ear "missed us."

He leaned in slowly and claimed her mouth with his own carefully at first but it soon grew in intensity.

"I love you," he stated pulling away when she needed oxygen and placing kisses along her neck as he spoke. "I will always love you."

**Dedications:**

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Thanks! I love you guys and your support means so much… Things are going to get a little bit more interesting really soon (you will see!). Till then!

Rockbandstar


	13. Edward's Solution

**Chapter 13- Edward's Solution**

**A/N- so I had one of those moments where you think your story is going somewhere and then you sit down and your characters take you someplace else entirely… You're in for one heck of a ride (that's a promise)**

They stayed out until Bella could hardly stand any longer. Opting out of going back to the hotel she instead rode with Edward and stayed at the Cullen's house.

There seemed to be a new intensity between Edward and her and Bella couldn't really put her finger on where or when it started. The feeling was a bit unnerving.

Alice had, of course, stashed clothes for Bella at the Cullen's home and she was relieved to note that pajamas were included in the items purchased, albeit not what she normally would have worn.

After having her human moment she excited the bathroom not really sure where she would be staying and not wanting to impose on anyone in particular.

"Let's get you to bed." Edward stated leading her quickly to his room and closing and locking the door.

When she gave him a questioning look he just smiled.

She lay down on the comfortable bed and could feel herself sink into the mattress. Letting out a sigh of pleasure she turned on her side and was surprised to see Edward laying in bed next to her.

"Isn't it hard for you to be so close to me after so long?" Bella asked softly.

"Somewhat but not nearly as bad as it was the first time."

She nodded her head softly saddened by the fact that being around her still pained him.

"Can we talk about why you left?" Edward asked so softly that Bella had a hard time hearing him.

"I think you and I both know why I left." Bella replied looking him dead in the eyes as she spoke "My stance on that hasn't changed, Edward."

"I know." Edward replied brushing his hand through his hair.

"Then what is there to talk about?" Bella asked rolling onto her back and staring at the ceiling.

"You know I love you, Bella right?"

"I do." Bella stated turning once again to look at him.

He leaned over and kissed her intensely for a moment before pulling back and looking in her eyes.

"For now, can that be enough?"

"I don't understand what you're asking Edward." Bella stated through her ragged breathing.

"I don't think I am strong enough…" Edward stated his voice breaking up "to stop."

"Oh," Bella stated as what he said dawned on her.

"I just want you to know," Edward stated leaning into her "that I do love you."

He kissed her again before lying next to her and softly humming until she fell asleep.

Bella could faintly hear voices in the next room stirring her from her sleep.

"You're going to lose her again!" Alice stated.

"How would you know," Edward growled in response.

"If you don't understand what I am saying than listen to my thoughts!"

"It's not that simple Alice." Edward responded his voice sounding strained.

"You've already lost her once Edward, can you deal with having it happen again?"

"It won't." Edward replied and Bella could hear the frustration and anger in his voice.

"I am telling you right now," Alice stated "that you have a choice to make. You better make it before it's too late, because this time I won't be so forgiving."

"I love her Alice."

"If you love her than you will do the right thing, Edward."

She turned her head looking at the door that they were talking behind. She had to admit she was far more curious than she should have been about what they were talking about.

The door opened and she quickly dropped her head back down on the pillow.

"I'm sorry if we woke you." Edward stated leaning over and placing a kiss on her forehead "Alice just had to talk to me now. Apparently it _couldn't_ wait."

He slid into bed next to her and pulled her into his arms.

"Is this the point where I say I think we need to talk?" Bella asked rolling over to look him in the eyes.

"It's nothing to worry about," Edward replied brushing her hair from her face as he looked down at her. "Go back to bed, love."

"Is Alice upset about last night?" Bella asked her cheeks blushing in embarrassment.

"Not exactly." Edward replied sighing "Please don't worry about this."

"Why do I feel like you aren't telling me everything?" Bella asked looking up at him.

"Because he's not!" Alice yelled from a different room causing Bella to wince and Edward to scowl.

"I will talk to you later." Edward muttered under his breath and Bella realized it was probably directed towards Alice.

"Edward," Bella stated sitting up and placing her back against the headboard of the bed "you need to tell me what is going on."

"What is going on is Alice isn't minding her own business like she should be." Edward replied as he glared at the wall.

"Edward" Bella stated "be honest with me. That is all I am asking of you."

Edward sighed for a moment before sitting up next to her and looking over at her. He reached over and brushed a strand of hair from her face before speaking.

"Alice see's some vampires coming to visit and she expects some _complications._"

"So do I need to leave Forks for awhile?" Bella asked "What can I do to make this better?"

Edward turned to look at her for a moment before responding "I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?" Bella asked softly leaning her head on his shoulder.

"No matter what action we take there are consequences."

"What is the best action?" Bella asked placing her face in the crook of his neck "The one with the best outcome."

She could hear Edward take a few deep breaths before he responded. "That is debatable"

She could hear a small chuckle escape her lips and she was surprised she was taking the news as well as she was.

"Just spit it out Edward." Bella stated running her fingers through his hair trying to calm him.

"Bella." Edward stated softly.

"Hmm?" She asked against his neck.

"Will you marry me?"

**A/N Part 2- Are you still with me? *Ducks head and hides behind laptop***

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The fact that you all love this story means a lot to mean and your reviews seriously cheer me on and get my butt in gear (to write more that is!).

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"Hang on because it's going to be a bumpy ride!"

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Seriously? How awesome are you guys!? *Blushes*

**So I know your probably hating me right now (I hate cliffhangers too but don't worry the next chapter will be up sooner than you know!**

**Rockbandstar**


	14. Reactions

**Chapter 14- Reactions**

**A/N- Wow the response to the last chapter was amazing! Some of you are going to love me and some hate me for this chapter (but it had to be done)! I won't spoil it so more note at the end!**

_Previously:_

"_What is the best action?" Bella asked placing her face in the crook of his neck "The one with the best outcome."_

_She could hear Edward take a few deep breaths before he responded. "That is debatable"_

_She could hear a small chuckle escape her lips and she was surprised she was taking the news as well as she was._

"_Just spit it out Edward." Bella stated running her fingers through his hair trying to calm him._

"_Bella." Edward stated softly._

"_Hmm?" She asked against his neck._

"_Will you marry me?"_

----

"What?" Bella felt the word tumble off of her lips.

"I said," Edward stated rolling off of the bed and onto one knee "will you marry me?"

Bella could feel her heart pounding in her ears and her mouth felt dry but her eyes didn't.

"Edward," she stated and she could feel the tears falling "I really don't know that I am ready for that I mean I just broke up with Jacob a few days ago and..." Her voice cracked as she spoke. "I just don't know."

"It has always been you Bella." Edward stated looking up into her eyes. "You know how long I waited for you and when I lost you I lost myself. I can't lose you again Bella, marry me."

She could feel the tears dripping off her chin and onto her camisole as she sat and just stared at him.  
"Edward," Bella stated "I'm still legally married to Jacob!"

"But you guys are separated! I'm not asking for it right now but I am asking for forever."  
"So you're going to change me then?" Bella asked sitting on the edge of the bed looking down at him. "If I marry you then you and only you will change me?"

Edward took a deep breath and looked up at her she could see his body physically shaking and the thought surprised her.

"I don't think I am strong enough, Bella. I thought we discussed this last night?"

"If you want me to marry you Edward this is the only way! I'm not having this argument with you again. If you can't do it I'm sure Carlisle would be more than willing to."

"NO." Edward growled lowly.

"So you can't do it," Bella stated her voice rising as she spoke "but you won't allow anyone else to."

"It's not that simple and you know it!"

She felt her feet move and was surprised to find that she was standing.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked and she immediately noticed the panic in his voice.

"I'm getting dressed," Bella stated making her way to his door.

"But then you are coming back here, right?" Edward asked now standing as well.

"This all just feels a little too familiar," Bella stated and her heart plummeted as the words continued to flow out of her mouth "I think I need some time by myself to think before I can give you an answer."

She heard a loud bang and turned around to look at him surprised to notice he was standing next to her.  
He stood with his hand pressed firmly against the door indenting the wood with his hand print.

"This conversation isn't over."

"Like hell it isn't," Bella stated "Let me out."

"I'm not letting you run out on me this time." he replied his voice icy "I won't lose you again."

"I don't think I am the one running from my issues, Edward." Bella replied calmer than she felt.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he asked.

"You're smart," Bella responded "you will figure it out."

"Don't play coy with me Bella if you have something to say," Edward responded "say it."

"FINE" Bella yelled walking away from the door and pacing the floor of his room "you want to know what I think, Edward? You want to know what I really think."

Her voice rose as she spoke and for a moment Bella wondered where the rest of the family was and if at any point they would be intervening. After all Edward couldn't keep her locked in his room forever.

"I think you're too damn stubborn for your own good. Your used to getting things your way, you need things easy for you. I love you, Edward I truly do. But for this to work we need to be equal."

"And we are not equal now?" Edward asked now standing with his back against the door.

"I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU, Edward. Is that what you want me to say?" Bella screamed and the tears started to fall down her face. She turned around so her back was to him as her body shook from the sobs.

She could hear a commotion outside of his door and she wondered who or what would be waiting on the other side for her.

She could feel him move to stand behind her and he spoke so softly she could barely hear him.

"But you are good enough for me. You're all I want, can't you see that?"

"Edward you can't even lay in a bed with me without being in pain, every time we get to close you pull away, I just..." She turned and looked at him for a moment and was surprised at the pain she saw in his eyes "I love you but this is the only way. If you want us to get married, if you want us to be together than I need to be changed."

"And if I can't do that to you?" Edward asked.

"Then I'm not really sure where that leaves us." Bella replied shrugging her shoulders as the tears fell down her face.

"I know you think you are a monster, Edward, I get that. I know that you think you are condemning me to some souless horrible existence but you're wrong. Would it really be so bad for us to be together forever?"

"Would you really want that?" Edward asked looking deep into her eyes "The constant thirst, the urge to kill, you would never feel normal again."

"BUT I WOULD HAVE YOU!" Bella yelled her body shaking in anger "I don't know how much clearer I can make this for you, Edward. I may be running, but I'm not running _from_ you. Don't you understand, isn't it clear?"

A loud sigh escaped Edward's lips as he placed his head in his hands. She could see his body was shaking and for the first time in a long while she felt her heart tear.

"Please don't leave me." Edward sobbed out and she was surprised by the emotions it brought up in her as well. "I love you; please please don't leave me again."

"I'm going to go get dressed," Bella stated placing her hand softly over the top of his "and then I am going to go downstairs and eat some food." His face rose to look at hers in terror and she continued to talk as she ran her hand through his hair.

"I'm not leaving, I promise you I will stay in this house, but I think we both need a bit of time to digest what just happened. I will just be right down the stairs if you need me."

He looked at her for a moment before silently and softly nodding his head. Grabbing her he pulled her to him and placed his head in the crook of her neck, breathing her in. She buried her nose in his hair and felt herself doing the same thing.

**A/N Part deux- alright so how many people saw that coming (show of hands? Anyone?) It had my beta in tears (sorry Ash!)… I'm not masochistic, honestly! I just felt like there was this huge tension about the past between them that needed to be cleared up before they could move on… **

**I'm not going to tell you what happens next but I will give you a few clues…. Alice plays a very MAJOR part in the next few chapters and in helping Bella 'decide' some things..**

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**Reviews- LilyAnneMarie, sassy2312, peny11, ILYTwilight, awesometastic twilight jasper, ultimateromantic, sleepthroughthestatic, bunny-trail, Deborah, TeamCullen88, TwilighterAnonymous89, flower123, and Ashlyn13**

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If you have an msn messenger (it is my favorite to use) and you have the winks (the little animated things) I totally did the pig dance when I got your reviews… yep that's right bum in the air wiggle around like I just don't care lol…. Seriously though you guys are amazing!

So a few of my friends and I were talking about the stories we are working on and I bragged about you guys, yup that's right! I totally bragged about my cool readers… how nerdy is that?

**And just because I have part of it written here is a teaser for the next chapter (which will probably be up Sunday or Monday)**

---

"He is too damn stubborn for his own good." Alice stated shaking her head as she plopped down next to Bella. "I really didn't see this one coming, well I mean I did but I thought I had talked some sense into him."

"Alice," Bella stated looking up at her friend from the plate in front of her "can I ask you something and you have to promise me that you will be completely and utterly honest with me."

"I only omit for your benefit, Bella, really. But I suppose just this once." Alice winked at her then and she felt a small chuckle escape her lips.

"Right now, without explaining what I am thinking, or feeling, what do you see in my future?"

**Rockbandstar**


	15. Let's Talk Part 1

**Chapter 15- Let's Talk Part 1**

**Sorry about the late post- FF wasn't letting me log in (grr)… anyways here it is!**

_Previously:_

_"I'm not leaving, I promise you I will stay in this house, but I think we both need a bit of time to digest what just happened. I will just be right down the stairs if you need me."_

_He looked at her for a moment before silently and softly nodding his head. Grabbing her he pulled her to him and placed his head in the crook of her neck, breathing her in. She buried her nose in his hair and felt herself doing the same thing._

_--_

Bella was unsurprised to find that when she opened the bedroom door most of the Cullen's seemed to be standing on the other side.

"I laid some clothes out for you in my room." Alice stated looking at Bella for a moment with a sad smile on her face.

"Thanks Alice," Bella replied letting out a sigh as she made her way to the familiar room. Changing quickly she avoided the "excitement" and made her way quickly to the kitchen.

"Here you go dear." Esme stated setting a plate in front of her and giving her a strange look before pulling her into a hug. "I am going to go upstairs and sit with Carlisle and Edward and give you and Alice a chance to talk." Esme looked at Alice for a moment in a motherly way and then stated "Play nicely girls."

"He is too damn stubborn for his own good." Alice stated shaking her head as she plopped down next to Bella. "I really didn't see this one coming, well I mean I did but I thought I had talked some sense into him."

"Alice," Bella stated looking up at her friend from the plate in front of her "can I ask you something and you have to promise me that you will be completely and utterly honest with me."

"I only omit for your benefit, Bella, really. But I suppose just this once." Alice winked at her then and she felt a small chuckle escape her lips.

"Right now, without explaining what I am thinking, or feeling, what do you see in my future?"

Alice seemed to freeze for a moment before nodding her head and softly closing her eyes. Bella briefly wondered if she should have waited until after they were out of the house so that Edward was out of earshot, but she had promised him she wouldn't leave until he was ready.

"I'm only seeing blips of what could happen and they are all a bit fuzzy, which leads me to believe you haven't really made up your mind yet."

"Okay," Bella stated rolling her eyes "a little less vague maybe?"

"Ummm." Alice stated hoping on her seat for a minute and looking around.

"They all have vampire hearing Alice they already know everything else," Bella stated sighing at the lack of privacy the Cullen household had.

"Hold on." Alice stated running from the room and coming back in with a jacket and pair of shoes for Bella.

"What?" Bella stated looking at the items "Alice I promised Edward that I wouldn't leave the house."

She heard Alice mumble under her breath and she heard a loud slam coming from upstairs.

"You're going to agree with me eventually so just do it now and save us both the trouble." Alice stated. "Of course I am going to stay with her, I'm not stupid and don't take that tone with me Edward."

Bella knew that if she wasn't so tense the situation would probably have been amusing. After all it looked like Alice was talking to herself, even if she wasn't.

"That is not what I am trying to do, Edward and you know it!" the girl pouted "I am trying to help you out here."

After another moment a bright smile came on the girls face and she turned to Bella holding the jacket up once again. "Let's go!"

They piled into Alice's car and Bella felt her head lay to rest against the passenger's window. She was more tired than she thought she should be, but it had been an emotionally draining day.

"I'm going to take you somewhere and then we will talk." Alice stated as she fiddled with the dial on the radio. Bella took this as the go ahead to close her eyes and try and think through the events of the morning.

She was more than a little surprised when Edward proposed to her, to say the least. But was she really opposed to the idea? She thought about the conversation that had taken place after that and the emotional ending that had her more worried than she realized. She made a mental note to discuss it with Alice whenever they got where they were going.

She lost track of time in the car as they drove and was surprised when Alice finally pulled over and got out.

Getting out of the car she looked around her for a moment before turning to Alice. "What are we doing here?"

"Well," Alice replied smirking "how opposed are you to breaking and entering?"

"What?" Bella asked stunned.

"Kidding," Alice replied "Just follow me."

Alice led her to the door and pulled out a single key, winking at Bella before opening the door. "Follow me please." Alice stated leading through the hallways and to a familiar doorway.

"Okay," Bella stated "I am not even going to ask about the key but Alice what are we doing at Fork's High."

Alice pointed in the room they stood in front of and led Bella to a very familiar lab table. "I thought this would be as appropriate place as any to talk. We didn't have to leave Forks which calmed Edward. Plus I figured how kismet would it be to have this conversation where you first met."

Bella could feel a slight chuckle escape her lips at her best friend and she sat in the very familiar old seat and looked around the room suddenly feeling sad.

"Do you know why I brought you here, to this very spot Bella?"

**So how many of you watched the Oscars the other night? I totally did I have to say RPatz looked amazing, no?**

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**AND for those of you who loved the last teaser here is one for Chapter 16**

"There are several different outcomes that can come to be, when someone is undecided, such as yourself, I see bits and pieces of each that aren't quite clear." Alice looked at her for a moment to make sure that what she was saying was clear before continuing "I've seen him change you so many times and in so many different ways that honestly it is a bit dizzying. But all of those were before the fight."

"Alice you're stalling," Bella stated frustratingly.

"Let me finish!" Alice replied huffing "When you asked me to look I was honestly surprised by what I saw because the fact of the matter is you have very clear and definite paths in front of you with distinctly different outcomes. My vision was clearer than I anticipated it would be."


	16. Let's Talk Part 2

**Chapter 16- Let's Talk Part 2**

_Previously:_

_"Okay," Bella stated "I am not even going to ask about the key but Alice what are we doing at Fork's High."_

_Alice pointed in the room they stood in front of and led Bella to a very familiar lab table. "I thought this would be as appropriate place as any to talk. We didn't have to leave Forks which calmed Edward. Plus I figured how kismet would it be to have this conversation where you first met."_

_Bella could feel a slight chuckle escape her lips at her best friend and she sat in the very familiar old seat and looked around the room suddenly feeling sad. _

_"Do you know why I brought you here, to this very spot Bella?"_

_--_

"Not really," Bella replied sighing "because this is where we first met?"

"Well that is a part of it," Alice stated "but I want you to think about that first day and the look in Edward's eyes. You know now how hard it was for him not to kill you that day; he has told me you discussed it. Now think about everything you guys have been through, and honestly I am not going to list it because the rap-sheet is a mile long. Can you see why the thought of losing you, of him not being able to stop is so terrifying to him?"

"He has stopped before." Bella replied softly feeling the weight of Alice's words.

"I know," Alice replied "and we wouldn't let him go into it blindly. I was a bit surprised that he said no to Carlisle doing it as well, then again he is stubborn. But that isn't really his issue is it?"

"Is he really afraid of me leaving him Alice?" Bella asked opening her eyes and looking at the girl next to her.

"Honestly," Alice stated letting out a gentle sigh "I've never seen Edward so emotional, ever, so I would probably have to say that yes that is a real fear he has."

Alice looked away from her for a minute before turning and looking her dead in the eyes. "You didn't see him for awhile after the wedding Bella," Alice grimaced as she continued to talk "and I am really happy that you didn't have to. He knew he pushed you away and he knew it was his fault that you were currently in another man's arms. It tore him apart and he showed it for quite a while afterwards. And when he found out that you were pregnant we basically had to lock him down from going and ending his existence."

A small gasp escaped Bella's lips and she could feel the tears forming in her eyes. "He was going to go back to Italy?"

"Well that was one option he considered." Alice responded scowling "But Carlisle talked him out of it by telling him how dangerous that would be for you. Then Emmett gave him this whole "what if" speal that really turned everything around."

"His what if speal?" Bella asked softly.

"Yeah, what if Jacob dies? What if Bella leaves him? What if Jacob imprints on someone else? A list of huge what if's that at the time were completely absurd but honestly it was something that gave Edward hope."

"You need to know this Bella because I know you doubt a lot of things right now, his love for you included. He loves you, he truly does. Heck if you don't believe me just ask Jasper he can feel it." Alice giggled for a moment before continuing "I have never and I mean never seen him as happy as he was that night outside of Charlie's house."

"You guys must all think I am such a horrible person for putting him through this." Bella stated her head dropping in her hands.

"Bella," Alice stated pulling her head up to look at her "we all love you. Myself more so but," Alice smiled a bit as she continued "you're a part of our family. I'm not going to say that some of us weren't confused about the choices you made but even so, through it all we still loved you."

"I understand why he doesn't want to change me, Alice." Bella stated sighing "But that doesn't mean that I agree with it or am okay with his decision. I just wish he would listen to me and understand where I am coming from."

Alice looked at her for a moment before nodding her head. "I agree with your point, Bella. Our predicament has always been a bit of a sore spot for Edward and I had hoped that the events of last time would have taught him something. He only wants what is best for you and is doing what he feels he needs to, to protect you. I'm..." and Alice wiggled around a bit. "I am going to explain to you what I saw without trying to influence your decision, I think."

"There are several different outcomes that can come to be, when someone is undecided, such as yourself, I see bits and pieces of each that aren't quite clear." Alice looked at her for a moment to make sure that what she was saying was clear before continuing "I've seen him change you so many times and in so many different ways that honestly it is a bit dizzying. But all of those were before the fight."

"Alice you're stalling," Bella stated frustratingly.

"Let me finish!" Alice replied huffing "When you asked me to look I was honestly surprised by what I saw because the fact of the matter is you have very clear and definite paths in front of you with distinctly different outcomes. My vision was clearer than I anticipated it would be."

"I saw Edward proposing again, I saw you saying yes and his grabbing you and spinning you around. I also saw you saying no and watched him crumble at your feet. I saw a wedding." Alice took a deep breath before continuing "I saw your funeral and it tears apart our family more than I am willing to admit. I saw you and Edward lying in bed together and he was changing you. I saw Edward asking Carlisle to change you. I also saw Edward telling you that he refused to change you."

"So basically," Bella stated softly "you saw every possible outcome."

"Basically" Alice replied looking at her for a moment "but there was one constant in _every single one_ of those visions Bella. You and Edward were _together_. Do you understand now?"

"That no matter what anyone decides we were meant to be together?" Bella asked looking into her eyes.

"I don't know, Bella, I just see the visions. I don't know how you two feel or what they mean." Alice shrugged as she smiled "But look on the bright side, you and I have many more years together."

Bella let out a small laugh at her friends perkiness and smiled. "I wouldn't have it any other way, Alice."

"Are you ready to go home and talk to Edward?" Alice asked.

"I think I am," Bella replied hopping off her stool.

"I knew you were going to say that." Alice replied causing both girls to laugh as they made their way back towards the car.

"Of course you did." Bella replied laughing.

**A/N- so here is the final part of their talk… Is it everything you expected? **

**I am going on vacation for the next week and a half so there will most likely be no updates (as I am not sure if our hotel has internet or not)… I will update as soon as I get back though (so keep an eye out for that)…**

**I can't wait to read what you all have to say about this chapter and their talk (as I think it is very important to Bella and Edward's relationship!) so tell me…**

**What do you think is going to happen next? What do you want to happen next? I'm looking forward to what you have to say!**

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Seriously… you guys are as RPatz crazy as I am… I LOVE IT! All of your reviews had me smiling and laughing… and yes the hiatus will kill me as much as you!

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I love new readers *does a little dance*

**Rockbandstar**


	17. Love and Respect

**Chapter 17- Love and Respect**

**A/N- I'm back! Relaxed, sun kissed, and raring to go! This is honestly another of my favorite chapters… let's see if you agree!**

_Previously:_

"_I don't know, Bella, I just see the visions. I don't know how you two feel or what they mean." Alice shrugged as she smiled "But look on the bright side, you and I have many more years together."_

_Bella let out a small laugh at her friends perkiness and smiled. "I wouldn't have it any other way, Alice."_

"_Are you ready to go home and talk to Edward?" Alice asked._

"_I think I am," Bella replied hopping off her stool._

"_I knew you were going to say that." Alice replied causing both girls to laugh as they made their way back towards the car._

"_Of course you did." Bella replied laughing._

_--_

The drive back to the Cullen's took little time but still gave Bella a chance to think. Bella was grateful that Alice had talked to her, as it helped her clear her head.

She wasn't sure when her ideas about life had changed but she knew it probably had something to do with Amber. She realized now how precious the time you had with loved ones was. Looking back now she realized all the hurt she was holding on to from the separation.

While she was never one to rely on others, she had come to need Edward almost as much as she loved him. Thinking through their past together truly solidified that thought for her. Alice was right on in choosing the location as well. She had to give it to the pixie she knew her stuff.

As they pulled back into the driveway she could feel her nerves getting the best of her and her stomach flip flopped. "It will be okay," Alice stated grabbing her hand for a moment.

"I know," Bell replied smiling softly.

"He is in his room when you are ready." And then Alice was gone.

She took the stairs slowly, carefully, processing her thoughts as she went. The house seemed eerily quiet and she wondered if everyone had left them alone or if it was just her nerves getting the better of her.

Steadying herself outside his door for a moment she leaned against the wall and closed her eyes. Taking a few deep breaths she made sure her heart and mind were in agreement before opening the door.

Bella could feel the weight of their argument still fresh in the air and she looked around the room spotting Edward sprawled out on the couch. He lay one arm hanging down and his other arm hung over his face. His hair was in wild disarray and she could only imagine how many times he had run his hands through it since she had left.

She made his way to him slowly sitting down carefully on the floor by him reaching out and taking his hand.

"Hi," she stated softly knowing he would hear her.

"I wasn't sure you were going to come back." He whispered in response.

"Do you honestly think so little of me?" Bella replied pushing a strand of hair from her face.

"Don't be absurd," Edward replied moving his hand so he looked down at her "I think so little of _me_."

"I wish you wouldn't" Bella replied curling her fingers with his as she lightly swung their hands.

"So did you and Alice have a nice chat?" Edward asked turning on his side to fully look at her.

"We did." Bella stated reaching up and touching his hair softly "It was very informative."

"I wish you wouldn't be so cryptic."

"Its payback," Bella replied smiling softly "for all the times you did it to me."

A small smile fell across his face for a moment before he frowned.

"Tell me what you are thinking."

"I'm thinking a lot of things," Bella replied softly "they are all very scattered but they all revolve around you."

"I love you," he replied reaching out and gently stroking her cheek.

"I know," Bella stated bringing his hand up to her lips and kissing it "I love you too."

"So are you going to tell me what you and Alice spoke about?" he asked sighing softly.

"It was killing you not knowing wasn't it?" Bella replied softly.

"A bit."

"I had some questions I needed her to answer and she had a few questions for me."

"Involving?"

"You," Bella replied. "Can I ask you about something and will you be totally honest with me?"

"Of course," he replied sitting up and pulling her up onto the couch next to him.

"What happened after I left?"

"Jasper and Carlisle came in and sat with me for a bit, helped calm me down and then left me to my thoughts."

"Not this time, Edward." Bella stated turning to look at him.

"Oh," he replied a frown etching his face "so that is what you guys were talking about."

"If you cared so much, why didn't you come after me or try and stop me?"

"Because I thought if that was what made you happy, then that was all that mattered."

"Why do you constantly doubt my love for you?" Bella asked softly "What can I do to make you see?"

"You shouldn't have to do anything." Edward replied just as softly "I just don't understand how you could want me, love me."

"You are not a monster." Bella stated reaching over and turning his face towards her. "I thank my lucky stars everyday that Carlisle changed you, made you what you are. Because if he hadn't I would never have known what love was like, how it could feel."

A small soft sob escaped his lips and she found that she was crying along with him.

"I'm going to stay, Edward," Bella replied pushing the hair back from his eyes as she continued to speak "because honestly I tried living once without you and it almost killed me. I can't and will not live that way again."

Bella took a deep breath before continuing. "I respect your fear about changing me, Edward, I really do. I just wish you would respect my trust and faith in you and in this family. My views haven't changed on this subject, but I am not running this time."

She leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead and then his lips before pulling back and looking at him once again.

"You're staying?!" he smiled softly as the words fell from his lips.

"I'm staying." She replied smiling in response.

"What happens now?"

"I don't really know," Bella replied shrugging softly "but I was kind of hoping that we would figure it out together."

**Dedications:**

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I have to give you guy's credit where credit is due! Not only did a few of you realize the significance of the title (chuckles softly to self) but a few of you are VERY observant! I definitely left a LOT of things open and there are definitely a lot of unanswered questions… all I can say is all in good time my lovelies! You won't be disappointed!

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So this is normally where I mention an obscure but funny quip…. *insert funny quip here*

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I got as many ads for favorites as I did reviews…. *cue shocked face*

**Love you all!**

**Rockbandstar**


	18. Making Plans

**Chapter 18- Making Plans**

_Previously:_

"_I'm going to stay, Edward," Bella replied pushing the hair back from his eyes as she continued to speak "because honestly I tried living once without you and it almost killed me. I can't and will not live that way again."_

_Bella took a deep breath before continuing. "I respect your fear about changing me, Edward, I really do. I just wish you would respect my trust and faith in you and in this family. My views haven't changed on this subject, but I am not running this time."_

"_What happens now?"_

"_I don't really know," Bella replied shrugging softly "but I was kind of hoping that we would figure it out together."_

_--_

They sat together on the couch, neither of them really saying anything. He reached over then, as if knowing her apprehension, and gently grabbed her hand lightly brushing his lips against it before holding it tightly in his own. Bella could feel the blush fill her cheeks, and a sigh escaped her lips as she leaned her head to rest upon his shoulder.

"Does this mean you are saying yes?" Edward asked smirking at her and causing a small laugh to escape her lips.

"Eventually it will be a yes, Edward." Bella replied ruffling his hair with her free hand "But I really think I should probably get a divorce before I even consider getting engaged again."

He nodded his head in contemplation for a moment before responding "alright."

"I should probably head over to Charlie's for awhile," Bella murmured "maybe cook him some dinner."

"He would like that," Edward replied softly "would you like me to join you or?"

"I think I should probably talk to him alone," Bella stated frowning as she spoke "he is holding out hope that Jacob and I are going to get back together, which isn't even a possibility anymore. Having you there might provoke him."

"He is going to find out about us sooner or later, Bella."

"I know and I am going to tell him," Bella replied "I just don't want to run in there, guns blazing. I need to ease it into the conversation. I don't want to make it more difficult for him then it is already going to be."

"That is respectable, I guess." Edward replied.

"You guys should go hunting while I'm out. I can just plan on crashing at Charlie's tonight, I know he won't mind."

"I would rather stay with you."

"I would rather have you stay with me too," Bella stated smiling softly at him "but it has been awhile since you have drank and you have to be getting thirsty."

As if to punctuate her point she ran her fingers softly across the purple bags that hung under his eyes.

"Kill a few lions or deer for me, will you?" Bella joked trying to rid herself of anxiousness that was now present in the pit of her stomach.

"Silly Bella," Edward replied clucking his tongue in amusement. "Stay out of trouble for me, will you?"

She pouted for just a moment, looking almost like a petulant child.

"I've done a pretty good job of it for the past few years now."

"I'm not even going to comment on that." Edward replied letting out a sigh. "I have five words for you; you lived with a werewolf."

She opened her mouth for a minute to respond before closing it and frowning.

"That's what I thought," Edward stated teasingly before leaning over and placing a kiss on her forehead. "I love you, my little danger magnet."

"I love you too, Edward." Bella replied looking at the clock and sighing.

"Come on love," Edward stated "I will drive you over there before we take off."

They left the house hand in hand, taking their time and focusing only on each other. He stopped her in front of her car door and looked around for a minute, smirking as his eyes met hers once again.

He leaned down then, kissing her softly at first before adding a bit more pressure and gently pressing her up against her car door. She could feel his lips folding over hers and could feel the chill of his hands on her face. She tangled her hands in his hair for a moment, feeling dizzy as a sigh escaped her lips.

As his mouth left hers, he traced a trail from her lips to her ear and whispered in her ear "I'm leaving my heart with you, I expect you to take care of It." before he placed another gentle kiss on her lips.

He pulled back then and looked at her, his brow furrowed. "Breathe Bella."

She opened her mouth and gasped as an influx of air filled her lungs, burning a bit in the process.

She blushed then, causing a small chuckle to escape his lips as he opened her door for her.

"What was that?" Bella asked breathlessly.

"I figured I would give you your goodbye kiss here, after all I didn't think you would want Charlie to see that."

"No," Bella replied "definitely not."

They both laughed then, and the atmosphere in the car instantly became light again.

"How long will you be gone for?" Bella asked.

"Hopefully we will be back before you wake up tomorrow morning." Edward replied. "Carlisle is working the night shift at the hospital and Esme is planning on staying behind as well, so both of them will be in town if you need something."

"It will just be for one night, Edward, I should be fine."

"I know," Edward replied "I just worry about you while I am away."

"I promise I will call you before I go to bed tonight."

He smiled at her then, really truly smiled. "I would love that, thank you."

They pulled into her driveway and Edward parked the car looking at her and then the house for a moment. He leaned over and placed a quick peck on her lips before pulling back and winking at her.

"See you soon."

"I'm counting on it," Bella replied as she hopped out of the car and made her way up to the house.

**A/N- There are a few clues in this chapter as to where this is heading cough*hint*cough…**

**Dedications:**

**Rold Gold Pretzels for making chocolate covered pretzels that you can buy in a bag! Seriously I have had like the _worst day_ and each bite makes it just a little bit better! **

**Reviews: Kate, awsometastic twilight jasper, puppypower149, flower123, DaniMC, Ashlyn13, and TeamCullen88 **

You are the frosting to my cupcake!

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"You've got a ticket to ride…"

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"I love the way you love me." OK so really bad reference but my brain isn't very quippy today.

**I'm almost positive I missed some of you… My inbox is jammed with so much junk right now that I'm not really sure what is up and down… so if I forgot you remind me (or give me a swift whack across the side of the head) and I will be sure to mention you next time.**

**Rockbandstar**


	19. Holding out Hope

**Chapter 19- Holding out Hope**

_Previously:_

_"It will just be for one night, Edward, I should be fine."_

_"I know," Edward replied "I just worry about you while I am away."_

_"I promise I will call you before I go to bed tonight."_

_He smiled at her then, really truly smiled. "I would love that, thank you."_

_They pulled into her driveway then and Edward parked the car looking at her and then the house for a moment. He leaned over and placed a quick peck on her lips before pulling back and winking at her._

_"See you soon."_

_"I'm counting on it," Bella replied as she hopped out of the car and made her way up to the house._

_--_

She entered without knocking, figuring that Charlie wouldn't care. He was sitting in his chair, the sports channel on when she popped her head into the living room.

"Well, Bells!" Charlie stated smiling at his daughter "What are you doing here?"

"I thought you could use a nice home cooked meal," Bella replied smiling at her father "plus I was hoping that we could talk a bit."

"That sounds great," Charlie stated.

"I was also wondering if I could stay here tonight," Bella asked.

"Of course," Charlie replied turning his attention back to the television.

She made her way into the kitchen, quickly maneuvering her way through it. She was amazed that, after all these years, Charlie hadn't moved a thing.

"How does steak sound?" Bella called out as she dug through his freezer.

"Sounds great!" he replied.

She went about the kitchen, preparing the food, and it almost felt as if she hadn't left at all. After sticking the steaks in the oven she made her way up the stairs to her old room. Plopping down on the bed she lay back and thought about everything that had happened in the past few days.

She looked around the room, her eyes settling on the old rocking chair. Memories seemed to flood her thoughts and she couldn't help but smile in response. She wondered if, when she and Edward lived together, they could put one in their room. The thought alone seemed to cause her heart to soar.

Getting up and looking around the room once more her eyes settled on her old desk. It had been a few days since she had checked her email and she knew that Renee had probably sent her something. Setting at her old desk, she opened her emails and wrote a quick reply, making sure to keep track of the time as to not burn the food.

She hurried down the stairs, amazed that she didn't trip and looked to see Charlie still sitting in the same spot. For some reason the thought was comforting.

When dinner was ready she placed the plates on the table and called out to Charlie. She was suddenly very nervous.

"This looks delicious, thanks Bells." Charlie stated setting in his chair.

"Thanks," Bella replied smiling at her father softly.

"So there was something you wanted to talk about?"

"Yeah," Bella replied reaching over and taking a drink of her water before continuing.

"Jacob and I had a talk the other night," Bella stated looking up at her dad hesitantly.

"That's great Bells; it's good that you two kids are trying to work it out."

Bella looked at him for a moment in surprise before continuing. "Actually, we're getting a divorce."

Charlie frowned then and set down his knife and fork focusing his attention on his daughter.

"What brought this on?" he asked.

"We talked about our marriage and all the mistakes we made," Bella answered. "It was a mutual decision."

"No one is perfect," Charlie replied "you can't expect Jacob to be."

"I know, and I don't." Bella replied "I told you things weren't going back to the way they were. It is what is best for all who are involved in the situation."

"Jake is a good kid. He may act a little strange at times, but he loves you Bells. I have seen the way he looks at you and I just don't want you to rush into this if you're not sure. I would hate to see you both hurt over this." Charlie replied.

"I am sure," Bella stated softly. "Trust that I know what is best for me, dad."

"I just didn't figure you and Jake would end up like your mother and I."

"I'm sorry you're disappointed dad," Bella stated softly setting her silverware down as well. "I'm sorry about everything but I need to make me happy and to do that I can't be with Jacob anymore."

"I just don't understand you used to be happy with him."

"Things change." Bella replied softly under her breath before looking up at him. "I promise you that we did not go into this lightheartedly. It really is what is best for both of us."

"As long as you are happy, Bells, that is all that matters." Charlie replied "I guess I was just holding out some hope that you two kids would work things out."

"I know you were," Bella replied "but with everything that has happened we can't just go back to the way things were."

"I was just hoping that the whole thing with Amber would bring you closer together, not tear you apart. I was so worried about you," Charlie stated "you had that dead look in your eyes like before. I just thought that maybe Jake would be able to fix you again."

'Jake wasn't the one I needed to fix me' Bella thought as she looked at her dad who was now shifting in his seat.

He cleared his throat then as if talking about a taboo topic before picking up his beer and taking a swig.

"So, was that all you wanted to talk about?" Charlie asked as he looked up from his plate.

"Well," Bella replied softly "there was something else I thought I should mention."

**A/N- yes I know, totally evil to cut off there but I had to do it for the next chapter to flow properly… speaking of the next chapter it's a bit of a doozy! I will hopefully have it up in a day or two!**

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**Rockbandstar**


	20. Repercussions

**Repercussions**

_Previously_

"_I was just hoping that the whole thing with Amber would bring you closer together, not tear you apart. I was so worried about you," Charlie stated "you had that dead look in your eyes like before. I just thought that maybe Jake would be able to fix you again."_

'_Jake wasn't the one I needed to fix me' Bella thought as she looked at her dad who was now shifting in his seat._

_He cleared his throat then as if talking about a taboo topic before picking up his beer and taking a swig._

"_So, was that all you wanted to talk about?" Charlie asked as he looked up from his plate._

"_Well," Bella replied softly "there was something else I thought I should mention."_

_--_

She took a deep breath to steady herself and then she looked up into her father's eyes.

"Edward and I are getting back together."

"Edward." Her father stated looking at her.

"Edward Cullen."

"I know which Edward," Charlie replied his face stern "is he the reason you and Jacob are divorcing and don't lie to me, Isabella."

"Jacob and I split up before it was even an option, so to answer your question no he doesn't have anything to do with it."

"I can't believe you are allowing him back into your life after everything that has happened."

"We've talked about this before dad," Bella stated her voice clearly showing her irritation.

"Well, let us talk about it again then." Charlie stated "What are you going to do if he leaves you again?"

"He is not going to."

"You sound awful certain for just getting back together with him." Charlie bit back.

"You're being unbelievable." Bella replied "You told me you wanted me to be happy, well Edward makes me happy."

"For now," Charlie replied "but what about years down the line. Jake was dependable, he cared about you."

"Are you insinuating that Edward doesn't?" Bella asked her voice incredulous.

Charlie let out a deep sigh then looking at her for a moment. "I get that you like him, maybe even love him, but you are sure moving fast."

"It isn't like it was planned, it just happened."

"It doesn't matter if it was planned or not," Charlie replied "think about how this will look to Jacob."

"Jacob knows, or at least has some idea about it."

"You're acting like a child, Isabella." Charlie replied "You are jumping into this head first and you are going to get hurt again."

"I wasn't asking for your acceptance," Bella replied "and I trust Edward not to hurt me."

"This is just simply unacceptable, Bella." Charlie stated looking at her. "Think about what people will be saying, thinking!"

"I thought you wanted me to be happy, dad!" Bella replied clearly frustrated at where their talk was heading. "Plus, since when have you cared what others said or thought?"

"I understand things didn't work out with you and Jake, Bells. I get that. But do you really think it is wise to just jump from one relationship to another?"

"I love him!" Bella stated hopping up and shoving her chair back in the process. "I always have. I'm not saying that I never loved Jake or that because we are getting divorced that I don't love him anymore. I am simply trying to be happy, can't you understand that dad?"

He let out a sigh then and ran his hands over his face for a minute.

"I feel like I don't even know who you are anymore, I feel like I am losing my Bells. Maybe you should head back to the hotel for the night," Charlie replied softly "it will give us both some time to calm down and think about things."

"Fine," Bella replied brusquely "if that is what you want."

"I think it would be best." Charlie replied.

Bella made her way quickly out to her car, ignoring the growing despair that was building in her stomach. She slammed the door, feeling the car vibrate in the process.

Pulling out her phone she quickly pressed the speed dial and listened impatiently as it rang and rang.

"Edward," Bella stated as the answering machine clicked in. She could feel her heart sink and tears begin to form in her eyes "I'm not staying at Charlie's tonight. Things didn't go very well and he asked me to leave. I'm going to head back to the motel so give me a call when you get this."

She slammed her keys in the ignition and quickly backed out of the driveway. Frustrated at the utter silence in the car she flicked through the radio stations trying to find anything to listen to, and anything to keep her mind of the events of the night.

She could feel the beginning of a headache pulsing in the back of her head and she suddenly wondered if she was going to be sick. She pushed the accelerator faster pushing back the tears that were threatening to spill over. It was at that moment that she heard a loud banging noise and felt the car begin to swerve.

She could feel the panic building up in her as she gripped the steering wheel, trying to control its movement. The car began to spin and then flipped, trapping her inside. She could feel the pain pulsing throughout her body and smell the blood that now trickled down her forehead.

She thought of Edward, of Charlie, of Amber, and of Jacob. Her vision blurred and she moved her hands trying to reach out for something, anything and then suddenly everything went dark.

**Special thanks to my beta Ashlyn13 and my magic eight ball (eighty) for convincing me under no certain terms should I change this…**

**I warned you it was going to be a bumpy ride! I have the next chapter done (and it will be posted in a day or two); I just want to see your response before I continue on!**

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**Reviews: puppypower149, Ashlyn13, and TeamCullen88**

I was kind of sad I only got 3 reviews for the last chapter… But I am glad you guys liked it!

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**RB**


	21. In the Clearing

**In the Clearing**

**A/N- Part Uno**

**Sorry the update didn't come sooner; I had a family emergency and haven't even been able to check my email since Wed. I thought this chapter was a bit scattered but my beta (Ashlyn13) swears it works… Enjoy!**

He stood in the clearing watching the deer drink from the pond. It wasn't his favorite but it would do. He felt the muscles in his body tense and he pounced latching onto the artery in the neck and draining it quickly.

"Edward." Emmett called and reading his thoughts Edward ducked as a tree branch flew over his head.

"Nice, Emmett," Edward replied rolling his eyes at his brother's antics.

"Dude, loosen up." Emmett called "Carlisle and Esme stayed behind, she is fine."

"I know," Edward replied shrugging "but I just worry about her."

"No need brother," Emmett stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"This is Bella we are talking about," Edward replied to his brother clearly annoyed.

Emmett laughed for a moment "the strangest things do seem to happen to her."

"Yeah," Edward replied looking up at the moon and frowning.

"What is troubling you?"

"She was supposed to call me before she went to bed," Edward replied looking at his brother.

'And you haven't heard from her so you are assuming the worst.' Emmett thought.

"I know it sounds crazy," Edward replied "but I really do love her and so many different things could happen to her."

"You guys just got back together, Edward. She isn't going to do anything stupid. Strange as it sounds she loves you."

"Thanks." Edward replied shortly rolling his eyes.

"No problem brother." Emmett stated looking at him for a moment and smiling.

"What?" Edward asked.

"You're so stressed out you didn't even hear your phone beeping."

Edward nodded at his brother in thanks as he pulled the phone up to his ear.

"Edward," it was Bella and his chest seemed to tighten and relax all in the same instant. "I'm not staying at Charlie's tonight. Things didn't go very well and he asked me to leave. I'm going to head back to the motel so give me a call when you get this."

He could tell that she sounded upset, the tremors in her voice giving her away. It almost sounded like she was crying and he instantly became worried. Pushing the speed dial he listened as the phone rang and rang before going to her answering machine.

"That's weird." Edward replied looking at Emmett. "She left me a message to call her back but she isn't picking up."

'Don't freak out,' Emmett thought. "She could just be away from her phone."

"Where did Alice go?" Edward asked.

"I'm not her keeper," Emmett replied shrugging his shoulders before turning away from him and looking in the distance. "She and Jasper took off in a different direction."

"We need to find Alice NOW." Edward stated suddenly terrified.

"Calm down Edward," Emmett stated picking up his phone "let me try and give her a call."

**************

"Caucasian female, mid twenties, unresponsive, trapped in rolled vehicle, critical condition, estimated arrival five minutes." Carlisle listened to the call as he stood next to the unit clerk signing the paperwork to release his latest patient.

"List as Jane Doe, no ID was found on the body." The voice continued as he made his way down the hall to prep the trauma room. He could hear the ambulance pull into the garage and heard the slow but steady beeping of the heart monitor as they wheeled the cart down the hall.

The patient was brought in and he was immediately hit by an unusually familiar scent. He heard the curtain being pulled, heard the nurse speaking to him, but when he looked down he was unprepared for who he saw lying on the cot.

"Bella," he stated looking up at the nurse who stood in front of him shocked.

"Julie call my son NOW." Carlisle stated "Tell him he needs to get here as soon as possible. Tell him it has to do with Bella."

The nurse looked frightened for a moment before running out of the room and down the hall.

"I need an intubation tube!" Carlisle called pulling the gloves over his hand and looking down at the girl. "Come on Bella, you can't leave us now."

****************

Alice was on her way at least that is what Emmett had told him. He could hear his sister's thoughts before he could see her and then she was in front of him.

"Alice," Edward stated his voice shaking slightly "what do you see in Bella's future."

Alice closed her eyes for a minute and Edward immediately scanned her thoughts. She forced her thoughts on Bella and suddenly everything was dark.

"What does that mean!?" Edward asked suddenly feeling panic fill him.

"I don't know," Alice stated and he could read the concern in her voice.

"Maybe she is with the dog," Rose stated appearing beside them.

"This is different," Alice stated her thoughts frantic, confused. "This is really different."

His phone rang then and he looked at it in his hand before he looked up at Alice who had a horror stricken look on her face.

"NO," Edward stated reading her thoughts the phone dropping out of his grip.

He had to be dreaming, that is what he told himself. He could feel his body shaking, and suddenly he was on his knees. He could hear voices but couldn't discern what they were saying. He found it hard to breathe and he wondered for a moment if this is what a panic attack felt like.

He shouldn't have left her; he should have sat in his car outside her house and made sure that she was alright. Someone's sobs pulled him from his panic and only after looking around in a daze did he realize that they were his own.

**A/N- Part Dos**

**Wowsers! I am amazed by all the reviews and am glad that a lot of you felt that I kept Charlie in character (I was a bit worried about that!)… I think you guys are pretty awesome, just thought I would share!**

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**Reviews: lalakid667, flower123 (2), awesometastic twilight jasper, krazykarah, Rachel-Elizabeth2010 (2), DaniMC, sleepthroughthestatic, starhealr, bellaedward4ever123, ultimateromantic, TwilighterAnonymous89, ashleylacey, and Ashlyn13 **

**Alerts: krazykarah, and sonyabrady1971**

**I'm really excited about this story as I see a definite path now of where it is going! If you are one of the people waiting for an update on C.U. or To Feel I am going to try and get those up soon!**

**Rockbandstar**


	22. Broken Hearted

**Broken Hearted**

He had never run so fast in his entire life as he did at that moment. Without saying a word, trusting Alice to explain, he took off leaving behind his family. He could feel his breaths coming out in pants, not that he needed them, and he pushed himself further.

Images flashed behind his eyes as he scanned the streets before throwing caution to the wind and continuing to run. He felt like he couldn't breathe, couldn't function, and the thought terrified him.

Entering the hospital he bypassed the nurse's station instead choosing to listen for Carlisle's thoughts. Finding them almost immediately the images that assaulted him almost brought him to his knees again. He made his way past the ER, noticing the smell of Bella almost immediately and causing his stomach to lurch.

Running to Carlisle's office he flung open the door and stood looking at Carlisle and Esme who sat calmly waiting for him to arrive.

"Tell me she is going to be ok." Edward stated looking at his father and closing the door behind him. "Please, dad, please tell me she is going to be ok."

*************

"What in the hell is going on?" Emmett asked looking at Alice who stood clutching Edward's phone in her shaking hand.

"Alice?" Jasper asked softly reaching out for her and gently pulling her to him.

"We need to get to the hospital," Alice stated softly "we need to get to the hospital NOW."

"Jasper," Rosalie stated looking at her brother "you are going to have to help us out here. I don't particularly like the feelings I am getting from you."

Jasper looked down for a minute at Alice reading her emotions and his forehead wrinkled up sending out a calming wave that seemed to relax everyone.

"Thanks Jazz, Bella was in an accident," Alice stated "her truck rolled and she was trapped inside." She hesitated for a moment before letting out a small cry "It is not looking good. There are so many tubes."

"Dude," Emmett stated as they made their trek back to the car "I don't think I have ever seen Edward run that fast before."

"I know," Jasper replied frowning softly. "I don't think I have ever felt an emotion so strong in my life."

"Speed up guys," Alice called running ahead "We don't have much time."

"What do you mean?" Rosalie asked scowling "Edward going ape shit on the nursing staff?"

"No," Alice replied "Charlie is taking her off life support."

"Fuck." Emmett cursed as he slammed his keys in the ignition "I hope this supped up engine can go Rose."

**************

"Maybe you should sit down with us, son." Carlisle stated frowning softly as he squeezed Esme's hand.

"Just tell me," Edward growled "I can read it in your mind so why don't you just SAY it."

"Edward dear," Esme replied getting up and walking over to him and pulling him into a hug. "Everything is going to be okay."

A sob escaped his lips as he looked at his mother "She isn't breathing on her own, mom. Everything is NOT okay."

"Her trachea collapsed during the crash," Carlisle stated standing up as well "the chance that she will regain use of it is slim."

"Does Charlie know?" Edward growled.

"He has been notified as he is her medical power of attorney. It is his decision whether we keep her on the ventilator or not."

"I will not watch her die," Edward howled "you know I can't do that."

"You need to keep your voice down," Carlisle reprimanded his son "I don't think they quite heard you on the fifth floor."

"There is something else you should know," Carlisle stated his frown etching deep in his face.

"Does she know?" Edward asked reading his mind, "Did she know?"

"I don't believe so," Carlisle replied frowning at his son. "She was completely out when she was brought in so I am sure everything that was said went unheard."

"What are you two talking about?" Esme asked looking between the two of them as they spoke.

"Bella was pregnant." Carlisle stated turning to look at his wife.

"WAS, being the key word." Edward growled "That wasn't your choice to make, dad."

"The impact alone caused problems, Edward. It was unavoidable. Bella was our first priority and we had to make sure she was okay."

"I understand," Edward replied "but I don't know that she will."

"We may not have to tell her." Esme stated quietly.

"What do you mean?" Edward asked a scowl now on his face.

"Charlie is taking her off of the ventilator." Carlisle stated looking at his son. "He wanted us to be the ones to tell you."

"NO." Edward roared his hands clenching onto the desk and breaking off the corner. "NO, no, NO!"

'There is another way.' Esme thought looking at him as she pulled him into her arms. 'But only you can decide that.'

"We won't go against you." Esme stated softly pushing the hair off his forehead. "But you don't have much time to make a decision."

"It was what she wanted," Carlisle stated "Can you really live without her?"

Sobs escaped his lips and he crumbled on the ground in front of them "I can't live without her, I won't."

"Then you know what you need to do," Carlisle stated softly "I will be there with you, son. It will be okay I promise."

"You can't promise that," Edward replied "so don't even bother trying."

**A/N- (And it's a BIG one)**

**I'm having a horrible week, and I think that kind of came out in the chapter (but it works)… I found out that my dog that we have had for 10 years is going to have to be put to sleep (cue tears)… he was running and tripped and injured his spine and is now paralyzed. Sigh. Where is a good stiff drink when you need one? Anyways sorry for the angst and tears, let me know what you think anyways!**

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**Reviews: KrazyKarah, lalakid667, Lionlamb81, Ashlyn13, Calista Catherine (2), puppypower149, starhealr, flower123, DaniMC, Jess, awesometastic twilight jasper, and TeamCullen88 **

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**I'm obviously not in a quippy mood but I would like to say thanks to you guys! Thanks for the support, your reviews always make me smile (some of you are quite funny)!**

**Coming up: a confrontation, a family reunion, and of course more drama.**

**Rockbandstar**


	23. Saying Goodbye

**Saying Goodbye**

He made his way quickly out of the office and down the hall, following the thoughts until he found the person he was looking for.

"This is your fault you know." Edward growled looking down at Charlie who sat slumped in a chair, his head in his hands.

"You don't know what you are talking about, Edward." Esme reprimanded him as he stood in front of his love's father.

"You pushed her away," Edward stated "she was planning on staying there and you asked her to leave. If you hadn't she would still be alive and well."

"I know." Charlie replied looking up at Edward "I was upset and needed some time to think. And I will regret that decision for the rest of my life, but eventually I hope I will learn to live with it. But this is my decision to make, I'm sorry Edward but it is what needs to be done."

Edward looked at him for a moment and suddenly felt overwhelmed by anger instead of speaking he nodded his head silently.

"I understand you two were important to each other," Charlie stated scowling "for whatever reason she went back to you. I just want to say thank you. You made her happy for her last few days and for that I will be grateful."

"I love her." Edward stated his voice shaking slightly.

"I think she loved you too." Charlie replied softly looking away from Edward and to the group of people that now crowded the doorway.

"I need to talk to Edward." Alice stated "Can you wait just a minute for us Charlie, I need to say goodbye."

Charlie nodded his head softly as he looked at the young girl in front of him. "For you Alice, of course."

Alice led Edward out of the room and down the hall stopping in front of an empty room.

"It's going to work." Alice stated pulling her brother into a hug. "I promise you Edward, it's going to work."

"I can't lose her, Alice." Edward stated his voice breaking as he spoke.

"And you won't." Alice replied "If you don't believe me, see what I see."

She closed her eyes and visions flashed before him almost staggering him in their intensity.

"She is so beautiful, Edward."

"She is." He stated his voice catching as he reached out and grabbed Alice.

"I'm afraid I won't be able to stop." Edward replied.

"But you will." Alice stated "I don't even think it is going to be a problem for you. You're too far gone Edward. You can't lose her, it's just not possible."

"Thank you, Alice." Edward replied hugging his sister to him.

"No problem." Alice stated smiling softly. "We're family, Edward that is what we are here for."

They made their way back down the hall stopping outside of the room Bella was in and Edward watched as Emmett sat next to her bed holding her hand.

"He is telling her all the cool new things he is going to teach her." Edward stated smiling softly and looking at Alice.

"We all love her, Edward." Alice replied softly.

Rosalie stood behind Emmett her hand on his shoulder and Edward was surprised to find grief in her thoughts as well. Jasper, still hesitant about the lingering sent of blood was in the waiting room with Carlisle, Esme, and Charlie. But Edward could clearly read his brothers thoughts of well wishes.

Alice walked in to the room and proceeded to lie down on the bed next to Bella softly talking to her about everything that they could do together now that they didn't have to sleep.

Edward stood and watched his family, trying to group his thoughts.

"So you're really going to do it?" Rosalie asked coming to stand next to her brother.

"I am." Edward stated looking at her and nodding his head softly.

"You really do love her." Rosalie replied tapping him lightly on the back "I can see it, you know. The way you look at her. I know I am the one who was most opposed to this besides you but I can't stand to see her in that bed, to see everyone so upset."

Edward looked at her for a moment reading her thoughts of acceptance.

"Thank you, Rose." Edward stated "It is easier going into this knowing that you guys all have my back."

"We do." She replied grabbing Emmett's hand as he exited the room.

His brother looked at him a frown upon his face. "I feel so guilty," Emmett stated "we didn't protect her."

"We didn't see this coming," Alice stated "I didn't see this coming if anyone should feel guilty it should be me."

"It was an accident." Carlisle stated standing next to his children now "It was no one's fault." He motioned them back towards the waiting room where Charlie was sitting. They made their way into the room hands connected in support.

"Shall we do this Carlisle?" Charlie asked.

The doctor nodded his head and led the small group of people into the room. Carlisle approached the machine slowly looking anywhere but at the girl lying in the bed.

"Are you sure Charlie? Once you do this that is it." Carlisle asked.

"I'm sure." Charlie stated looking down at his daughter "I love you Bells," he replied closing his eyes for a moment and nodding his head. "I'm sure."

Carlisle pressed a few buttons and a slow and steady beeping sounded. The machine made a gentle whooshing noise and then it was silent. Edward could still hear the slow but steady rhythm of her heart but her breathing was noticeably absent.

Charlie bowed his head for a moment, his grief obvious, and then turned and silently walked out.

He watched his father flick off the heart monitor raising his eyebrows in question as he looked at Edward.

"She can't survive very long without the oxygen," Carlisle stated softly to his son. "We need to make this quick and then get her out of here."

"I understand." Edward replied softly.

He stood next to her looking down at her as she lay in the bed. Leaning over he brushed his lips over her lips and frowned when he didn't get a response. Brushing his lips over her eyelids, cheeks, and nose he ran his hands along her face marveling at the warmth.

Edward turned to look back at Alice who nodded her head in encouragement, silently telling him that it would be ok. He took in a deep breath to steady himself and tried to memorize the moment.

"There isn't much time, son." Carlisle stated gently laying his hand on his shoulder. Edward nodded his head softly in response. He watched his family as they left the room, to give him his privacy, and once again took an unneeded breath.

"I love you Bella, always." He cradled her face and lowered his lips to her neck whispering "I have to be with you, I can't live without you, I am sorry. It's the only way. I love you."

He could feel the venom pool in his mouth and he licked his lips for a moment before opening his mouth and pressing his teeth into her. Blood pooled in his mouth and he gulped it down forcing the venom into her bloodstream and running his tongue along the mark sealing it.

Reaching down he bit each of her wrists quickly sealing them and following with her ankles. He could hear the movements of his family in the hallway, Alice and Carlisle's pacing, and blocked everything out but Bella.

"I'm here," he whispered lying down in bed next to her "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

He could hear the blood pumping through her system, smell the venom coursing its path through her, and then the cries started.

**A/N-I just wanted to take a quick second to thank all of you who sent messages about my dog. It really means a lot to me that you guys care! Thanks to Ashlyn13, my amazing beta!**

**Dedications:**

**Reviews: Rachel-Elizabeth2010, Jess V, sleepthroughthestatic, lasergirl20, DaniMC, TwilighterAnonymous89, KrazyKarah, screaming bubbles, TeamCullen88, awesometastic twilight jasper, flower123, bellaedward4ever123, starhealr, and Ashlyn13**

**Alerts: Rachel-Elizabeth2010, lasergirl20, Bella2222, and StargazingHighschooler**

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**Rockbandstar**


	24. Fighting the Darkness

**Fighting the Darkness**

It was cold, so very, very cold. Her body ached and as hard as she tried, Bella found that she couldn't move. She could hear people talking and the voices seemed familiar, but she couldn't place from where.

Her mind ticked through events trying to process what had happened. She knew that she had been leaving her father's house after getting into an argument. She had been driving and something had happened, she had crashed.

She felt like something was sitting on her chest and the pressure seemed to only increase as they moved her. Her lungs were burning and she felt as if she were gasping for air. She felt something sharp slide down her throat and it hurt.

She fought every muscle in her body to move, but they wouldn't budge. She felt needles poking her, prodding at her, people touching her, and she could do nothing about it.

Bella wanted to scream, to tell them to stop, to call for Edward. She heard Carlisle's voice and her heart rate picked up when he told his nurse to call Edward.

Her brain felt fuzzy and she concentrated on anything fighting off the darkness that seemed to be overtaking her.

She listened as Charlie spoke to her. He was apologizing for the fight, for letting her leave, and she knew that he would forever blame himself. Bella had heard one of the doctors saying something about respiratory failure and she knew that meant that her lungs were no longer working on their own.

Thoughts of Edward seemed to flutter behind her eyelids and she wondered for a moment if this is what it felt like to die. She could feel herself moving, being lifted, and she chose not to fight it letting herself go limp.

She would recognize the arms anywhere and as they held her all other thoughts seemed to leave her mind. He was sobbing softly into her hair, apologizing over and over for leaving her alone. He, too, blamed himself.

"I love you," Edward whispered and the room was suddenly quiet once again. She listened to the sound of the beeping heart monitor, the whooshing noise of the machine next to her, and patiently waited.

It seemed like hours later that she felt a cold hand grasping hers. She wanted to respond, to open her eyes and look at the person next to her, but couldn't find the energy to do so.

"It's me." Emmett stated as if knowing her internal struggle. His voice was softer than she was used to and she could hear the emotion in his voice "Rosie is in here as well. We are all here for you, Bella. We won't let anything happen to you."

Emmett squeezed her hand softly for a moment and she heard some shuffling. "It's worse than I thought." Rose stated softly.

"It is." Emmett stated his voice breaking.

"He is going to have to change her," Rose replied.

"Yeah," Emmett stated "your opinion is clearly documented, please don't make this harder."

"I'm not going to," Rose replied "they love each other and they should be together. It's the only way."

"Think of all the things you will be able to do with us now, Bells." Emmett stated "I can't wait to see you fight your first grizzly. And don't think that you and I aren't going to be having a few strength competitions. I've got to give you a chance to beat me while your newborn strength is intact."

Bella felt the bed shift next to her and then she heard Alice's voice tell Emmett and Rose to go talk to Edward in the hallway. As if sensing her unease, suddenly, Alice was speaking to her.

"Oh, Bella you are going to be so beautiful and just think of all the shopping we can do…" Alice continued to talk and Bella found herself spacing off and thinking about Edward.

Everything seemed to fade around her and Bella could hear little as she pictured herself and Edward sitting together in the meadow. The image brought her comfort and she suddenly felt a wave of calm overwhelm her.

She could hear Carlisle saying something about oxygen but she couldn't understand what he was saying. Her lungs were screaming in protest and it was only then that Bella realized that she wasn't breathing any longer.

She felt a pair of cold lips press against hers and the darkness seemed to grow around her. She wanted to cry out for Edward; to tell him she couldn't breathe but the words wouldn't leave her.

The world was closing in around her and her feeling of calm left her. She fought against the darkness clouding her mind as she heard Edward speaking to her, bits and pieces of it making it through the fog.

"Love you..."

"Always…"

"Can't live without you…"

"Sorry…"

She could feel the chill of his face against her neck and she fought as hard as she could against the fog overtaking her brain. Feeling herself become weak, everything went black.

**

They were sitting in the meadow and she had her head on Edwards shoulder. "I would do anything for you," Edward stated looking down at her.

"I know," Bella stated softly running her hand along the crease in her forehead.

"I love you."

"I love you too," Bella replied.

He kissed her then and she wrapped her hands around him, tugging at his hair.

"Stay with me." Edward stated.

"Always." Bella replied softly.

**

She could feel a pain pulling her from the darkness, could hear Edward speaking, and suddenly she was on fire. Her hands wanted to claw at herself to get the fire off of her but she couldn't move. She opened her mouth, gasping for air but getting no relief. In anguish, and burning from the inside out, she let the pain overtake her.

**A/N- a bit of a rehash but a lot of you wanted to know what Bella thought was going on,if she was aware, ect… so there you go! Hopefully this answers your questions and YES Bella was dying when Edward bit her! (I wanted to keep it semi close to BD in that aspect as I thought that was important to Edward in a way… if you have questions about my philosophy on this feel free to pm me… love to talk about it!)**

**I'm going away for a few days and unfortunately that means I probably won't be updating until Monday (unless inspiration strikes…) so look for an update on Monday!**

**Dedications:**

**Reviews: Ashlyn13, TwilighterAnonymous89, flower123, Noble Korhedron, lalakid667, KrazyKarah, Rachel-Elizabeth2010, Skweekie, Oshin37, Annie Little (2), soccerchic-fanficfanatic13 (2), Lionlam81, sleepthroughthestatic, bellaedward4ever123, DaniMC, and TeamCullen88**

**Alerts: snowystar2, simi05, Annie Little, Isle Esme, the swiss miss, Skweekie, **

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**You all are amazing!**

**Rockbandstar**


	25. Dedicated

**Dedicated**

_Previously:_

_She could feel a pain pulling her from the darkness, could hear Edward speaking, and suddenly she was on fire. Her hands wanted to claw at herself to get the fire off of her but she couldn't move. She opened her mouth, gasping for air but getting no relief. In anguish, and burning from the inside out, she let the pain overtake her._

_--_

She awoke in confusion.

Her eyes flittered across the room landing on a hundred different things at once, each evoking different thoughts and emotions. The fluttering of thoughts only seemed to confuse her more.

Hearing a noise behind her she jumped to her feet pressing her back to the wall and looking for the source. Her eyes met those of Edwards and she felt her posture relax slightly.

"Edward," she stated tenderly.

"How are you feeling?" he asked softly.

"Confused," Bella replied shrugging "really really confused, there are so many different things to process."

"You will get used to it." Edward replied "It's a different way than you are used to thinking."

She nodded her head, quickly diverting her attention to a picture on the wall.

"Where are we?" Bella asked her head whipping back and forth as she looked around the room.

"We're at one of our cabins." Edward replied "We thought it would be best to take you away from civilization for awhile until we see how you can adjust to everything."

Bella nodded softly contemplating something for a moment before lifting her hand up and stretching it out towards him, touching his hand with her fingertips.

"We feel the same now." Bella stated looking up at him and smiling.

"We do." Edward replied slowly reaching his arms out and pulling her into a hug. "Are you thirsty?"

Bella contemplated his question for a moment before responding with an "I don't think so."

His brow furrowed for a moment as he looked at her before nodding his head in acknowledgement.

"What happened?" Bella asked trying to think back "I don't remember, everything seems kind of hazy and I just want to know what changed your mind."

"You were in a car accident and Charlie was pulling you off of respiratory life support." Edward looked away for a moment and Bella could see each different emotion pass on his face. "I love you, Bella, always. I couldn't imagine what my life would be like without you and I didn't want to. Living without you made both of us miserable and this was the only way for us to be together."

Bella quickly processed everything that he was saying before she looked up at him frowning. "So you did it because you had to." She pulled away from him turning to look out the window into the Forest.

"I did it because I love you." Edward replied placing his hands on her arms and turning her around to look at him. "Not because I had to but because it was the only way. I love you, Bella; with all of my heart I love you."

He gripped her face, forcing her to look at him as her eyes trailed around the room.

"Bella, look at me." Edward stated softly "Do you love me?"

"Yes," Bella replied softly confusion still present on her face.

"Then that is all that matters, I couldn't lose you again Bella. I just couldn't." He ran his hand through his hair for a moment before looking at the door and smiling softly.

"Wait your turn Alice," Bella stated hearing the noise outside the door and causing everyone to chuckle. She was amazed by how clear everything was, how easily it was to hear every minute detail.

"Bella, do you want to be together forever?" Edward asked.

"Yes," Bella replied tenderly.

"Then marry me." Edward stated reaching into his pocket and pulling out a box, flicking it open so she could see the ring.

She smiled and could hear Alice squealing in the hallway and being held back by someone causing her to laugh.

"Yes." Bella answered bringing her attention back to Edward. "Yes, I will marry you."

He slipped the ring on her finger and then gently ran his thumb across the three square diamonds, before looking up at her, his face glowing.

She took an unneeded breath and noticed that her eyes were stinging. Bringing her fingers up she laughed when she noticed there were no tears.

"It feels weird," Edward stated his voice full of emotion "but you get used to not being able to cry."

She nodded her head sheepishly for a moment before leaning in and placing a not so gentle kiss on his lips. She wrapped her arms around him and into his hair and he pulled back after a moment smirking.

"Careful, love."

She chuckled softly before responding "sorry."

"We're going to be together forever!" Bella stated softly as she tenderly ran her fingers along his face marveling at how it felt to her new skin.

"Forever." Edward replied.

Bella continued to gently trace the features of his face and thought about the fact that she would never have to go another day without seeing him, without seeing his eyes, his face, without kissing his lips.

She leaned in and placed another kiss on his lips before pulling back and smiling at him softly.

"You can come in now, Alice."

**A/N- I'm back! So I'm debating on where to go with this story (I have a few ideas anyway) and I want your guys' opinion… **

**What do you want to see happen? What do you hope happens?**

**For those of you who have been asking… I haven't forgotten about my Twilight story Currently Untitled I am just trying to figure out where I want the story to go… so look for an update on that soon!**

**Dedications:**

**To all of you who were rooting for another marriage proposal (one done right)...**

**Reviews- KrazyKarah, Ashlyn13, Rachel-Elizabeth2010, ardana (2), flower123, DaniMC, screaming bubbles, -Azn-Grl-Twilight-Fan- (3), TeamCullen88, Kitasky123, fabm21, the swiss miss, and TwilighterAnonymous89**

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**Rockbandstar**


	26. A Time to Mourn

**A Time to Mourn**

It had been a whirlwind of a week, Bella thought, as she pushed her hair out of her face and looked over at her sister. Thinking of Alice as her sister caused a small smile to flutter across her face for a moment before other thoughts consumed her.

Today was her funeral.

The thought caused a small dull ache in her chest that only seemed to grow when she realized all of her loved ones would be mourning for her. She thought of her mother and father, the images in her brain somewhat fuzzy but the feelings remained as strong as ever.

She gripped Edwards hand in hers, knowing that soon he would have to leave her side and head to the cemetery. He squeezed her hand reassuringly for a moment before leaning over and placing a gentle peck on her forehead.

He had been so patient with her this week, taking her out on her first hunt and helping her to adjust. She couldn't help but feel guilty for taking the news so hard, for having a hard time coping. The thought that her loved ones were just a quick run away made the small ache grow in size and she momentarily brought her hand up, holding the internal wound.

"Are you okay, Bella?" Alice asked worry etched along her features.

Bella nodded her head silently, not trusting herself to speak as she sat and looked out the picture window at the trees behind the house. She momentarily wondered if Alice could see what she was planning, before throwing the thoughts out of her head. Better not to think about it.

She watched as Alice and Edward shared a 'look' that only meant that they were communicating silently to one another. Annoyance took over her posture and she stood up quickly, moving away from the two of them and deeper into the house that she now called home.

Bypassing the staircase, she made her way through the kitchen and onto the patio, letting the gentle breeze clear her thoughts. She heard footsteps in the kitchen and quickly jumped the railing, landing easily in the grass.

And then she ran.

The wind blew her hair around her, shadowing her face as she moved. Her lungs, still not used to her new body, gasped for air but she pushed on. She knew, without thinking, where she was heading and knew that the Cullen's would frown upon it.

She didn't care; it was something she had to do.

As she made her way into town, the smell overwhelmed her senses and she came to a stop. Testing herself she inhaled deeply, searching for her thirst, for a loss of control. She was stronger than she thought.

She kneeled by a tree, her head buried in her hands as the emotions overtook her. To her old family she was dead, but to her new family they were just beginning. She wondered if she could really do this to them, betray their trust so strongly, just because of her need for closure.

Bella heard the footsteps behind her and before she could react she felt two strong arms encircle her.

"If you're going to do this, Bells," the voice stated "you probably should cover yourself a bit because it is pretty obvious who you are."

She turned around meeting the eyes of Jacob's and felt her nose scrunch in distaste of his smell. He chuckled in earnest for a moment before his eyes softened.

"How did you know?" Bella questioned curiously.

Jacob shrugged for a moment before reaching his hand out and pushing her hair out of her face. He frowned at the turmoil he saw there before continuing to speak to her.

"He doesn't know you're here, does he?"

"No," Bella sighed softly "he doesn't. Although I am sure he has figured it out by now."

Jacob nodded his head in acceptance for a moment before handing her a large sweatshirt and a pair of sunglasses.

"Make sure to put the hood up and stay out of sight."

"I will." Bella responded her eyes darting around, looking for faces in the crowd.

"Are you sure you can handle this?" Jacob asked "You need to be sure."

"I am." Bella replied tugging the material over her head and shoving the glasses on.

"I'm going to stand with Charlie," Jacob stated "he is taking this really hard and I want to be there to support him. As soon as this is over you guys need to leave." His eyes bored into hers as he spoke. "The treaty has been broken and even though I understand why, action will have to be taken."

"I understand," Bella replied "Thank you for your help, Jacob. It is more than I deserve."

Jacob nodded his head his body rigid as he looked at her. "Just be happy, Bells." And then he was gone.

She stood near the tree, keeping herself well hidden as she watched people approach her family offering their condolences. She could hear the gentle sobs of her mother and father as they carried in the casket, which she assumed was empty.

Bella watched as her mother and father hugged her new family, their expressions of grief causing her heart to break. She could feel the tears sting at her eyes, but knew that she could not cry. Forcing herself not to break down, she listened and fought to memorize every detail.

The priest spoke a passage of grief and hope that stirred inside her and made her feel alive for the first time since she had been changed.

_There is a time for everything,  
__And a season for every activity under heaven:  
A time to be born and a time to die  
__A time to plant and a time to uproot,  
A time to kill and a time to heal,  
A time to tear down and a time to build,  
A time to weep and a time to laugh,  
A time to mourn and a time to dance,  
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,  
A time to embrace and a time to refrain,  
A time to search and a time to give up,  
A time to keep and a time to throw away,  
A time to tear and a time to mend,  
A time to be silent and a time to speak,  
A time to love and a time to hate,  
A time for war and a time for peace.  
__**Ecclesiastes 3:1-8**_

Bella watched as they began to lower the casket and listened to the sobs and cries of grief.

She looked at her mother and father, silently letting them go and saying goodbye. She looked at Jake, who stood so proudly next to Charlie and forced herself to memorize the face of Amber's father. Her eyes met those of Edwards, the sorrow on his face causing her breath to catch.

"I had to remember, to say goodbye." She whispered knowing that he could hear her. His head nodded slightly in understanding.

She stood still for a moment, looking around at the people that had loved her. The words of the priest impressed in her mind, tangling with her thoughts. She knew that this memory, the last memory of her family, would have to suffice.

She made her way back through the trees, the image of the blue tent ingrained in her mind.

**A/N- how many people saw that coming? (I know I didn't!)**

**Dedications-**

**Reviews: Oshin37, Noble Korhedron, Kitasky123, that one girl, lalakid667, sleepthroughthestatic, flower123, TwilighterAnonymous89, screaming bubbles, Ashlyn13, Annie Little, KrazyKarah, TeamCullen88, fabm21, and wannabe alice**

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**You guys are amazing!**

**Rockbandstar**


	27. Planning

**Planning**

_Previously:_

_She looked at her mother and father, silently letting them go and saying goodbye. She looked at Jake, who stood so proudly next to Charlie and forced herself to memorize the face of Amber's father. Her eyes met those of Edwards, the sorrow on his face causing her breath to catch._

_"I had to see, to say goodbye." She whispered knowing that he could hear her. His head nodded slightly in understanding._

_She stood still for a moment, looking around at the people that had loved her. The words of the priest impressed in her mind, tangling with her thoughts. She knew that this memory, the last memory of her family, would have to suffice._

_She made her way back through the trees, the image of the blue tent ingrained in her mind._

_--_

She knew he was there before he even entered the clearing, his distinct smell swirling around her, intoxicating her.

"How did you know where I was?" Bella whispered smiling softly.

"Because I know you, Bella." Edward responded laying next to her his hand entwining with hers.

"And also because of Alice," Bella teased not taking her eyes off of the sky above her.

"That had to be hard for you to see," Edward mumbled his free arm wrapping around her "so hard to do."

"I hated that my memories were blurry, hated myself for not remembering them clearly. It was something I needed to do. And yes it was hard." She buried her face in his shoulder, taking comfort from his arms.

"I just wish you would have told me how hard this was for you, how much you wanted to see them, you know I would have found a way to help you. I would have found a way for you to see them."

"I just didn't know if you would understand." Bella whispered "I didn't intentionally want to hurt you, to just take off, but it was the only way I could see it happening."

"Bella," Edward sighed turning on his side to look into her eyes "don't you understand, don't you see? I love you, Bella. You are my life. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you, this included. I'm just hurt that you didn't come to me."

"I love you too, Edward. I'm sorry I didn't discuss it with you. Honestly it was kind of a last minute thing. I tried not to plan it so that Alice wouldn't see."

"Well," Edward mumbled softly "I got to give you one thing, you sure know how to work your way around all of our powers."

Bella found herself giggling softly as she rolled in the grass.

"The service was beautiful," Edward whispered kissing her head and pulling her closer to him "so wonderfully you. They even had a few literature readings after you left."

"I was impressed by what I saw," Bella replied "I really liked the passage the priest read."

"It was very beautiful," Edward responded nodding softly.

"It made me think about a lot of things, Edward. I don't want to wait for life to pass me by anymore. No pun intended of course. I want to get married soon; I want to spend the rest of my existence with you."

"You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that!" Edward stated grinning as he leaned down and pressed his lips frantically with Bella's.

"We have a bit of a problem though." Bella winced as she recalled her conversation with Jacob. "We have to leave Forks soon. The wolves know that you changed me, they are saying that you broke the treaty."

"I did." Edward stated softly "I couldn't let you die, Bella. I just couldn't."

"I know," she replied softly smiling "I'm glad you didn't. But the fact remains that we need to be leaving town before things escalate."

"We could head down to Vegas and get married there." Edward responded the grin still present on his face.

"I was thinking of something else," Bella replied softly looking up at him through her eyelashes.

"Whatever you want, love." Edward answered laughing as his phone rang.

"Alice!" Bella stated smirking as she took the phone out of his hands.

Edward could hear murmurs of conversation but tried to block out most of the details as his sister and future bride discussed their plans.

A few moments later Bella closed the phone a triumphant grin on her face.

"As horrible as this sounds," Bella giggled "I get my small wedding because everyone thinks I'm dead and Alice can't find a way around it!"

Edward couldn't help but laugh at how delighted his fiancée was about this small fact. "I'm sure that irked her to no end."

"A bit but there wasn't much she could do about it. Anyways it will be very us. A small ceremony with just the family, it sounds perfect to me!"

"As long as you are happy, then I will be as well!" Edward smiled softly. "Now where were we before the phone rang?"

He pulled her to him then, his lips folding over hers and covering up the giggles that were escaping her lips.

"I'm so glad you think this is funny." Edward replied his head lulled back against the ground.

"Shut up," Bella replied "and kiss me."

He leaned over the top of her, letting his weight settle onto her for the first time. Smiling he leaned down and their lips met in the middle. His hands tangled in her hair pulling her tighter to him. She tugged on the soft down of hair by his neck before pulling her head away.

"You don't have to breathe anymore."

"I forgot." Bella stated laughing.

He chuckled at her softly kissing her lips before placing gentle kisses on her cheeks, eyes, nose, and neck.

"Silly Bella." Edward murmured his lips moving along her neck. "Silly, adorable, beautiful, loving, Bella."

_**A/N-**_

_**So I know it's a bit of fluff… but it is leading up to the wedding you all have been waiting for! Plus we haven't gotten a whole lot of ExB happiness… I had to rectify that!**_

_**Thanks to my super awesome, super spunky beta Ashlyn13!**_

_**Dedications:**_

_**Reviews: Kitasky123, Nuttyginger, human Alice, TeamCullen88, flower123, sleepthroughthestatic, Ashlyn13, and Oshin37**_

_**Favorites: Heshurdazleme**_


	28. Forever

**Forever**

**Mood Music: Bella's Lullaby**

**Please forgive me for errors as I didn't have my beta read this- why you may ask? Because I wanted to surprise her! This one is for you Ashlyn! Thanks for all the work you do!**

Bella stood in front of Alice, her hands placed on her hips and a frown upon her face.

"But I haven't seen him in _forever_."

"It's only been 24 hours, Bella." Alice chided "You will see him in a bit and the more you argue the longer it will take."

Bella pouted for a moment, before sighing in acceptance and shrugging her shoulders.

"Fine, you win this round."

"I win every round." Alice teased sticking her tongue out before chuckling softly. "It's going to be perfect. Alaska was a wonderful choice, Bella."

"I hope so," Bella replied tugging on the dress that Alice had picked out for her. She had to give the girl credit where credit was due. Alice definitely knew her fashion and the dress was _so Bella._

The dress was a beautiful off white that made Bella's cream skin seem to glow. The dress was strapless and had a few small cascading layers that were bunched at her side. There were gems and beads sewn into a layer of lace covering the fabric. It was perfect.

She could only imagine what it would look like once she was out in the snow.

Bella tugged once again at the fabric frowning softly at Alice.

"This dress is gorgeous but the underwear you picked out, not so comfortable." Bella mumbled rolling her eyes.

Alice's tinkling laugh made her smile. "It wasn't picked out for you anyway."

If she could blush, Bella would be.

She looked out the window as Alice continued to pick and prod at her hair shaping it until it was perfect. The snow was just beginning to fall down, creating a wonderland like atmosphere that made Bella catch her breath.

Alice was right; it was going to be perfect.

Bella was surprised at how little her nerves were bugging her and if she hadn't known any better she would have thought Jasper was in the vicinity. But she knew otherwise. All of the men had been kicked out the day before under the pretense that if Edward and Bella couldn't be together than none of them could.

They had taken it in stride, although Bella was pretty sure that Rosalie had snuck away for a quick nightcap sometime around one. She let it slide, laughing in earnest for her dear sister.

She felt Alice tap her on the shoulder then, signifying that her hair was complete. She turned and looked in the mirror gasping at the up-do that Alice had created. Her hair was braided and twisted and knotted in such an intricate pattern that if not for her vampire sight she wouldn't have noticed it all.

"Beautiful," Esme stated popping her head into the room. "Bella you look exquisite."

"Thanks, mom."

Esme's eyes were suddenly glistening and Bella swore she heard a soft sob escape her lips.

"I love you, Bella. Thank you for making my son happy."

Bella turned and hugged her, pulling Esme tightly to her. "Thank you for taking care of him and helping him become who he is today." Bella replied.

"I have a gift for you," Esme stated suddenly pulling out a blue stone necklace and holding it up for Bella to look at. "Consider it your something old, borrowed, and blue. This was a necklace my mother gave to me many years ago. I would like for you to have it."

"I would be honored to wear it," Bella replied her voice cracking with emotion as Esme placed it on her.

"And consider your lingerie something new!" Alice chirped causing all the women to laugh.

There was a gentle knock on the door then, and Esme smiled as she opened it revealing Carlisle.

"It's time, Bella."

--

Snow was gently falling, clinging to hair and eyelashes. The ground and trees sparkled with moonlight's illuminated frost. Edward stood in the middle of a clearing, his brothers next to him. His loneliness, which had once overwhelmed him, was now being sent away forever.

He was marrying Bella in exactly 2 minutes and 48 seconds.

Snowflakes the sizes of quarters were falling thickly through the darkness. Snow covered every surface; at least three feet of it. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, second only to Bella. He could see Alice skittering through the trees, making sure that Bella was out of sight.

The pixie was being annoyingly efficient.

Before he knew it, he heard the gentle sound of his lullaby for her playing from a small handheld radio that Esme held. And then it began. He smiled softly as each of his sisters made their way into the clearing, listening to their thoughts of joy and love.

And then he was standing still in awe as Bella slowly moved towards him, the light from the moon washing out the trees behind her and making her glow like an angel. His father's arm was linked with hers, Carlisle standing in for Charlie who couldn't be there.

He could feel his breath leave him and he swore he felt his dead heart stutter to a start. She was beautiful and she was his. When she was close enough to reach out and touch, he noticed the snowflakes stuck to her eyelashes and hair. They glowed like diamonds in the moonlight, but it was nothing compared to the smile on her face.

His father placed her hand in his and Edward squeezed her fingers gently before bringing her hand to his lips and kissing it.

"I love you," he spoke softly, reverently.

"I love you," Bella replied bringing her hand to cup his jaw as she smiled in response.

Edward placed his hand on the small of her back and turned towards the minister, a vampire friend of Carlisle's who was to perform the ceremony.

It was a small group of people, just his family really, but they were the only people Bella had really wanted there anyways. It was perfect, Bella was perfect and he was whole again.

Edward wasn't aware of most of what the minister was saying, or even what his family was thinking, it seemed like all he could feel and think and breathe were Bella.

When it was time for him to say his vows he found that his voice didn't want to work and he smiled at his brother's laughter gently clearing his throat.

"Before you, Bella, my life was incomplete and lacking. I went through the motions of living without really experiencing anything that my heart and mind longed for. And then you entered and brightened my sky, brightened my world, and my cold dead heart. It was you Bella who brought me back to life, not Carlisle or the venom but you. We've been through so much together, more than our fair share and yet we still stand here today. I love you Bella, I have always loved you since the moment I first laid eyes on you and it while it may have taken me awhile to know it, it has always been my truth. I promise to love and cherish you today and every day of forever, my love, my wife."

Edward reached up and gently placed his hand on her cheek, smiling as she nuzzled her face into his hand.

"Edward," Bella whispered her voice full of emotions "I've never been one to speak as eloquently as you on our love, but I'm going to give it a shot. Growing up I never really got the chance to be a child, to have someone to care for me and put me above all else. You have given me that kind of love, Edward. You anticipate my wants and needs and make sure that they are met whether I want them to be or not." A small chuckle was heard among the group and Bella smiled softly before continuing.

"You've given me a family, one that I care for as if they were my own. I was going through the motions of what I thought life should be like, but when you came along I finally truly started to live. We have had our ups and downs, that is a fact, but through each of those moments it was always you. I love you Edward and I will always love you every day of the rest of my existence. I promise you that."

They exchanged rings quietly, each looking into the other's eyes reading the emotion that was present on the other's face.

"I love you, Bella." Edward whispered softly as if it were a prayer.

"I love you too," Bella's voice broke with emotion.

"And by the power invested in me by god and the state of Alaska I now pronounce you husband and wife. Edward you may kiss the bride."

With his family hooting in the background Edward wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. Their lips met softly at first before urgently moving over each others as they melded together. Edward could feel Bella's tongue snaking across his lips and opened his mouth deepening their kiss. Pulling away he ignored the catcalls of Emmett and picked her up spinning her around, her laughter causing him to smile.

"I give you Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen."

**A/N- so there it is! The wedding you have been waiting for… did it live up to your expectations? This story isn't quite complete (but we are almost there)… there will be a few more chapters and an epilogue! I will also be posting a few outtakes that people have requested *cough*begged for*cough* (such as Edward's POV at Bella and Jacob's wedding!) so if you have a request send me a PM… I only plan on doing a few.**

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**You guys are amazing!**

**Rockbandstar**


	29. Outtakes Set 1

**Outtakes- Set 1**

**_Bella and Jacob's Wedding - EPOV – Outtake_**

How had he let things turn out like this? How could he let her go? How did he let her turn around and walk away? Bella had been the love of his life, yet here he sat reading the invitation to her wedding. His Bella was getting married, to Jacob Black. He wondered if he had pushed her to him, if she turned to him for comfort.

He remembered the day she left with more clarity than he wished he did. They had a huge fight over her desire to be changed. He told her under no uncertain terms, and watched as she walked out of his life. Maybe it was something about that moment, but thinking back it wasn't worth it, not now that he was losing her.

He could have tried to stop her, but he was so angry and upset. And she was determined she was right. This was one argument that at the time was not negotiable. He snuck into her room the next night, determined to check on her, to make sure that she was okay. He looked around the room and saw the crumpled Kleenex in the garbage can.

He had made her cry.

He placed the ring she had returned to him onto her desk (she should have it, after all it belonged only to her), looked around once more, and then walked out of her life forever.

But, yet, here he sat silently reading over the wedding invitation that had been addressed to him. He knew that the pup wouldn't have wanted him there, would have told her to let it go. So he knew without a doubt that it was from her.

He decided then, that if he couldn't have her than they could at least try to be friends. And he had tried. They had met in a group setting frequently, hanging out like the old times. But they were still just friends and that fact tugged on his heart strings more than he was willing to admit. It made him realize what he was missing out on, what he had lost when she had left.

And he didn't like the feeling.

He could tell from the look on her face, and in her eyes, that she was happy. Not necessarily in love, but happy. She laughed, and smiled, and joked. Each word that she spoke showed him what a complete and utter imbecile he really was. It was infuriating.

He put on a mask the day of the wedding, pretending that it didn't bother him. He knew his family didn't buy it, but it was the best he could do. When the words "I do" tumbled from her lips he felt his heart shatter. Alice seemed to look at him out of the corner of her eyes and he recognized the emotion immediately.

Pity.

He pictured what it would be like if they were standing together at the altar. The way his hand would gently caresses hers as they touched, the way his eyes would never leave hers for a moment. He could feel the emotions stirring in him, feel them overwhelming him. He felt a wave of calm overtake him and frowned softly at Jasper who shrugged.

"If you can't be happy, at least be calm" Jasper whispered so that no one else could hear.

Edward watched the dog wrap his arms around her for their first dance as man and wife. He watched as Jacob danced like an imbecile with his pack brothers, and watched as Bella made her way through the crowd. She glowed.

He noticed her talking to Alice, and couldn't help but frown wondering what meddling the pixie was doing. As long as Bella was truly happy, his misery meant nothing. He stood to leave, watching her for a moment more before truly letting her go.

His heart broke with each step that he took, but he didn't look back. Walking out into the cool, night breeze he took a deep unneeded breath.

"Congratulations," he sobbed softly into the air feeling the burn in his eyes, a telltale sign that if he could cry he would be. "I hope that you are truly happy."

He would pretend that they were okay and that they could start over with a clean slate. He would pretend that their love had never existed, that they had never existed. He would pretend for her because he loved her too much not to.

--

**_Alice's Vision- Hotel Room- Alice's POV_**

"I'm sorry Alice," Bella stated once again frowning as well now. "Why don't we do something instead of just sitting here staring at each other or the walls?"

Alice squealed then and Bella instantly winced. "Not shopping, Alice."

Bella couldn't help but smile as Alice began to mumble under her breath "Of course, not shopping! Unbelievable! She doesn't even have any clothes."

Suddenly Alice could feel a vision filling her mind, feel it taking over her senses. The hotel room around her faded away and she saw Bella lying in the grass of the meadow.

"_It's been so long since I have been here." Bella whispered. Edward walked out of the trees and made his way into the clearing, sitting next to her._

"_I haven't been here in quite awhile as well." He ran his hand through his hair as if embarrassed by his admission. "It was just too hard and held too many memories."_

"_How did things get so messed up?" Bella questioned her tone sad as she looked up at him._

"_I don't know, but I hope it can be fixed?" Edward responded his voice clearly nervous._

"_What are you talking about?" Bella sat up now looking into his eyes._

"_I love you Bella, I have always loved you, and I will always love you. I was stupid and selfish and I should have just changed you when you wanted me to. Neither of us would have had to live through all this pain and suffering."_

"_I love you too, Edward." Bella cried. And suddenly their lips met and they were kissing. Edward pushed her down into the grass pulling back, his breathing ragged. _

"_I can do it, Bella; for you. If you want me to I will do it."_

_Bella was trembling beneath him, her breathing haggard and her face flushed._

"_I don't want you to regret it." Edward whispered._

"_If I have you, I won't."_

_Edward's nostrils flared and he leaned down tracing the expanse of her neck with his tongue. _

"_This is going to hurt," Edward mumbled softly "I am so sorry, but I won't leave your side. I love you."_

_And then his teeth sank in._

Alice sat for a moment with jaw dropped open in shock and then she began to giggle.

"What is it, Alice?" Rose asked softly.

"Umm." and Alice looked around the room for a minute her eyes meeting Bella's. "Nothing." She stated in a sing song voice as the smile on her face grew larger.

"Why do I get the sneaking suspicion you're lying?" Bella asked raising her eyebrows as she looked at Alice.

"I would never!" Alice stated almost too innocently.

"Now, now girls," Esme reprimanded. "Bella if Alice doesn't want to tell us there is probably a good reason why."

**A/N- Alright… there are the first two outtakes.. I have gotten a few other requests which are**

**Edward's POV of "the phone call" where he finds out about Bella and Jacob and "the bruise"**

**Edward's POV of "meeting Amber" in the hospital where he snuck in to see her**

**Jacob's POV of the "talk" outside Charlie's house**

**Edward's POV of the chapter "Let us Pretend" **

**Alice's POV of "the phone call" from the Hospital and getting to the Hospital/Edward**

**Anything else you can think of?**

**Let me know because I will probably only write a few more outtakes! Either leave it in your review or PM me!**

**There are only a few more chapters left (including 1 after the wedding, 1 or 2 more outtake chapters, and an epilogue)**

**Dedications:**

**Reviews: screaming bubbles, Ashlyn13, KrazyKarah, TeamCullen88, Kitasky123, and fabm21**

**Alerts: heart496, BriyerRose, MaximumRide TwilightLover**

**Favorites: heart496, ClubEmmett, MaximumRide TwilightLover, mimozka, tarina-aisling, Belladeehanson, BriyerRose**

You guys are making writing this story so enjoyable for me… You all are amazing! Thanks once again for the wonderful support!

**Rockbandstar**


	30. Outtake 2 Let Us Pretend EPOV

**Outtake 2- Chapter 8 Let Us Pretend EPOV**

**Italics are things Edward is thinking! Quite a few of you requested this one… hope it lives up to Bella's perspective!**

Edward watched as she talked to the dog and it seemed like they were coming to some sort of understanding. Would Jacob really be okay with them being together? It didn't seem likely, but Edward could hope.

He watched Bella fuss for a moment, clearly restless and lost in thought, before putting her hair down and lying in the grass. The moonlight glittered off of her skin and for a moment Edward could picture her as one of them; as his.

The thought made him breathless, not that he needed to breathe. He could tell she was getting cold from the moisture in the lawn and he instantly regretted the fact that he could not warm her. Not wanting her to get sick and needing to make his presence known, he finally spoke.

"You know," Edward whispered as he moved close to her "as a child I used to look up at the stars and make wishes on them."

She turned to look at him then and she had never looked more beautiful. Bella's eyes were full of an innocence he hadn't seen in a long time and he was instantly drawn into her.

"And did it work?" Bella asked.

Edward contemplated the question for a moment amused by her curiousness. She had always loved to hear stories about his childhood, his human years. He would do anything to make her happy.

"It depended on what I wished for. Something trivial like a toy, I almost always got. Other things were not so easy to attain."

Bella frowned as she looked away from him, up to the stars once again. He wondered what she wished for, what her true heart's desire was. He couldn't dare to hope that it was him, especially after all this time.

"I miss that innocence of childhood. As you get older things just seem to get more complicated."

"They certainly do," Edward answered, thinking through his many years of life and contemplating how life had only seemed to become more difficult.

"How long have you been standing there?" Bella asked turning and looking at him.

"Since Alice said that she saw you disappear." Edward tried not to smile and he quickly looked away.

"And how much of that conversation did you hear?" she asked softly, almost too sweetly.

Edward answered hesitantly, not wanting her to become angry with him. He just wanted to make sure that she was okay, safe. "Most of it. More than you probably wanted me to."

A gentle sigh escaped her lips and her brow scrunched up. The sound made him turn and focus on her, noticing for the first time how truly tired she looked. He wondered if he should send her inside, do this another time.

Bella looked up into the sky then, closing her eyes tightly.

"What are you doing?" he asked in amusement.

"Shh, don't interrupt me." Bella replied whispering "I'm wishing on a star."

He loved her more in that moment than he ever had before. He lay beside her and watched her, so innocent and suddenly carefree. Looking up and closing his eyes he made a wish.

_Please let her love me._

He could hear a small chuckle escape his angels lips and it made the corner of him mouth twitch into a crooked smile.

"What are you doing?" she asked and Edward could still hear the amusement in her voice.

"I figured if you could make a wish, so could I." He had the urge to look at her, to touch her. Opening his eyes he feasted on her presence. It had been so long since they had been this close. He missed it. He reached over and brushed a strand of hair from her face "It's only fair after all."

"And what did you wish for?"

Edward thought back to his childhood and remembered something his mother had once told him. Looking at Bella he smirked as he answered her.

"I can't tell you or it won't come true."

"Fine then," Bella replied pouting slightly causing him to chuckle.

"Well are you going to tell me what you wished for?" The curiosity was clawing at him. With anyone else he would have known. Even after all these years she was still a mystery to him.

"Nope." Bella stated popping the p.

"Are we going to talk about what I overheard then," Edward asked sitting up slightly and looking down at her.

Her nose scrunched up in response before she answered him. "Can't we just lie like this for awhile and forget about the world, at least for a little while?"

"Yes, we can." Edward whispered resigned "But we still need to talk about it and I won't forget that no matter how much you delay."

"I know," Bella sighed "but for right now just let me pretend."

"Silly, Bella." Edward replied shaking his head in amusement before lying back against the grass. "For now then, let us pretend." He whispered. While Edward was a bit confused at the idea, he would do anything to appease her, to show her how much he loved her. He reached over and took her hand gently squeezing it before bringing it up and kissing it softly. The contact made his lips tingle.

Edward could hear her heart rate increase and he found that she had turned to look at him. The moonlight reflected off of her so beautifully that if he could have cried, he would have. "What are you doing?" she asked, her breathing labored.

Did he really have that much of an effect on her?

"I thought we said we were pretending." Edward answered innocently, smiling crookedly at the reaction he was receiving.

"Right," Bella replied and her voice wavered from nerves. He laughed softly at the reply loving the fact that she was speechless.

"What are you thinking about right now?" he asked her.

"You," she replied honestly, blushing slightly as she did so. His fingers ached to reach over and run across her cheek, across the blush he had missed so much. Giving in he finally did so.

"Don't be embarrassed I think about you all the time."

"Edward," she replied breathily and he instantly thought of kissing her, of holding her. She reached over and brushed his hair from his forehead causing his breath to catch. Bella's fingers lingered by his face and the heat made his whole body tingle.

"Bella," Edward replied back softly pushing his face into her hand so that she was cupping it. "I missed you."

"Oh, Edward, I missed you too." Bella replied softly. He could tell she was fighting back tears. "More than you know."

"I think after your little talk with Jacob I am beginning to believe that." He answered honestly, the words spoken so softly he wasn't sure she could hear them.

"Edward are we still pretending?" Was that hope he heard in her voice? Was that hope he felt in his heart?

"I'm not." Edward replied honestly as he turned to look into her eyes. Her beautiful, brown eyes that were silently pleading with him, calling to him. "I can't pretend I didn't hear what you said Bella."

"And what is it that you heard." Bella asked her eyes shining with unshed tears.

"Oh my Bella, please don't cry." Edward stated rubbing her cheek softly. His heart felt like it was going to break from the site and he could feel the steady ache in his chest. "I can't take it when you cry."

"Tell me, Edward. Tell me what you heard."

"You love me," he whispered reverently as he kissed her softly on the forehead "after everything you still love me."

"I do," Bella replied the tears now falling down her face "it's always been you, Edward."

"Always?" Dare he hope? Would his love return to him after all this time? Would she forgive him?

"Always," Bella stated her eyes shining as they looked up into his.

"Jacob was right about one thing, Bella. You are the only one worth living for. I do love you, I always have. I will always want you, always. I never should have let you walk out that door. I never should have made you doubt my love for you. It is I who am not good enough for you Bella. I'm the one that put us in this position. But still you love me as I love you."

He leaned in and slowly kissed the tears from her cheeks. _I love you, my Bella. I love you. I love you. _The thought seemed to chant in his mind each time his lips graced her skin.

"You have been through so much pain because of me. I am so sorry my love." _I will spend forever making it up to you._

"I needed you Edward and you weren't there." If he could cry, he would have been. Edward could feel his heart shatter at the words and the truth of them. He would be there from now on, no matter what.

"I know," he replied running his fingers along her eyelids brushing the new tears away "never again."

He leaned down and placed a trail of soft kisses on her face touching her forehead, her eyelids, her nose, and her cheeks.

"Edward," Bella gasped "just kiss me already."

She was always so impatient and it hadn't changed. It amused him. A soft chuckle escaped his lips and the sound made her smile softly. Edward made his way to her lips, she was trembling in anticipation.

"As you wish my love," Edward whispered as he leaned down and met his lips with hers.

_Whatever you wish._

**Next up is most likely going to be either an after wedding chapter or the epilogue… haven't quite decided yet.**

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**Reviews: KrazyKarah, screaming bubbles, Kitasky123, DaniMC, sleepthroughthestatic, Skweekie, and Ashlyn13 **

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**You guys are amazing! Thanks for inspiring me!**

**Rockbandstar **


	31. Epilogue

**EPILOGUE**

**Several Years Later**

Bella made her way up the familiar drive, stopping at the house she once called home. Brushing her hair out of her face she took an unneeded deep breath. The house in front of her held so many memories, so much history that for a moment her silent heart hurt.

While it had pained her to do so, Bella had made the journey alone; leaving Edward and his family behind. Under any other circumstance it would have been foolish for her to travel by herself, but this time was different and they knew that.

Jacob had gotten a hold of her to let her know that she was allowed back into Forks for one day, but only if she arrived alone. While the treaty had been broken, his status as the pack leader had benefited her, if only for that day.

Charlie had passed away in his sleep a week before.

Jacob, understanding the need for her to say her peace, had allowed her the time to do so while restricting the presence of the one person she truly needed, Edward.

Adjusting the sunglasses on her face, she opened the car door and stepped out onto the familiar gravel path. The wind billowed around her and her hair flew wildly in the wind. Jacob stood alone on the porch, now older and more refined.

"Bells," he whispered softly.

"Hey Jake." Bella waved softly as she leaned against her car.

Without saying a word he made his way to stand beside her, pulling her in for a hug which she gently returned.

"I'm so sorry." Jacob stated softly into her hair. "I know how much Charlie meant to you."

Bella nodded her head, reflecting on his words. While Bella didn't remember much from her human life, she clearly remembered her love for her father. The image of him at her graveside was still ingrained in her memory, her last moment with him.

Pulling a set of keys out of his pocket Jacob handed them to her, his gaze distant.

"After dad died," Jacob's voice broke as he talked "Charlie became like a second father to me. He took me fishing with him, we would have dinners together, he helped lead and guide me. I would have done anything for him Bells, this is just my way of making things right."

Bella could feel her eyes burning with unshed tears as she fingered the house keys, looking off in the distance.

"I know he loved you Jacob, thank you for taking care of him after I left."

Jacob nodded, before shrugging his shoulders. "I've missed having you around Bells, I really truly have. Charlie is buried next to your plot." He smiled bitterly then "That sounds so weird to say."

"Thank you Jacob, for letting me…"

"Like I said," Jacob replied interrupting her "I did it for him."

Bella nodded curtly before opening her car door. She turned back to him, a small frown on her face. "I will be gone by tomorrow night."

Jacob nodded his acceptance heading down the road before disappearing into the woods.

--

Bella sat in the grass, slowly tracing her fingers over the engraved words. She was overcome by emotion and her eyes burned with unshed tears. Words flowed through her mind, but nothing seemed appropriate or adequate to express everything she needed to say.

"I guess I should say surprise." Bella sighed softly "I should also say I am sorry, that's probably where I should start." Bella laughed at how foolish she sounded and how strange it felt to be talking to her father's grave but she needed to get it out. "I couldn't tell you, no matter how much I wanted to, I couldn't put you in danger. I miss you daddy. I've missed you since the moment I left. I love you. I'm so sorry I had to deceive you that I put you through so much, but I promise I am happy now. Edward makes me happy."

Bella shoved her hair out of her face, letting the emotion of the moment overtake her. "I promise you that I am living each day to the fullest. The Cullen's are so wonderful to me, Edward is so wonderful. We got married shortly after everything happened. We've been living in Alaska. The Cullen's have this beautiful house that is kind of out in the middle of nowhere. It's finally feeling like home to me."

She continued to talk for a while before brushing her fingers once again across the stone. "I will visit as soon as I can."

--

Standing in front of her car Bella looked up at the house in front of her. The home which once seemed so welcoming now seemed foreboding. Taking a deep breath she steadied herself before entering the house. She was startled by the familiar smell of the house, the warmth of the familiarity washing over her.

Making her way through the house she gently ran her hand along the banister, Charlie hadn't changed a thing. Bella heard movement in the living room and then a soft and unmistakable voice called her name.

"Bella."

She turned, her eyes immediately meeting his and a small sigh of contentment escaping her lips.

"What are you doing here? You are going to get in trouble."

"I'll deal with Jacob later," Edward mumbled pulling her into his arms and holding her tightly. "My wife needs me and I don't care what anyone says I am going to be there for her."

Bella felt him gently nuzzle his nose into her neck and a sigh escaped his lips. "This is right where I belong," Edward whispered "right here with you."

"Are you okay?"

"Surprisingly so," Bella replied pulling him closer to her "I missed you."

"I was miserable without you." Edward stated "Jasper finally kicked me out of the house because of my moping. Jacob was unreasonable in his request and I think he will let this slide."

"But you can't be sure."

"No I'm pretty sure," Edward stated tapping his head as he smiled at her. "Plus Alice kind of sort of told me that if I sneaked in we would get away with it."

Bella felt a gentle chuckle escape her lips. "Leave it to Alice to find a way around the rules."

"Eh, at least she is good for something." Edward tilted her head then placing a gentle kiss onto her lips and rubbing his hand against her cheek. "Other than shopping that is."

"I love you," Bella smirked, her arms tangling in his hair and tugging on the ends.

"I love you, Bella." Edward murmured kissing her forehead and then her nose. His lips hovered over hers and he smiled wickedly, his lips brushed hers as he continued to speak. "You know the house is empty."

Bella shook her head chuckling softly. "Not happening."

Edward got a wicked glint in his eyes as he ran his hand down through her hair. Leaning over he whispered gently into her ear, "We will see about that."

His tongue sneaked out and traced the curve of her ear. Bell could feel the puff of his breath on her neck. "Bella," he whispered.

"Hmmm," she hummed as he kissed her neck sweetly.

"I love you my beautiful, dear, sweet, beloved Bella."

**Well this is it… I'm honestly sad to see this story end as it was my first Twilight fan-fic. I want to say thanks to all of you who reviewed, added to your alerts, or your favorites. You guys helped encourage me when I was down and made me want to write, you are all amazing!**

**Dedications:**

**As always to my friend and beta Ashlyn13!**

**Reviews: Ashlyn13, sleepthroughthestatic, screaming bubbles, KrazyKarah, Noble Korhedron, kitasky123, and Rachel-Elizabeth2010**

**Alerts: twowordsemmettcullen, **

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**There have been a few questions regarding will or won't there be a sequel and the truth is I'm not quite sure yet. I will definitely post to let you guys know if I do decide to do one.**

**Thanks for your support, you guys rock!**

**Rockbandstar**


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